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Crazy Ex Wife Thread

jsnakejsnake Posts: 5,979 ✭✭✭✭✭
If you have a crazy ex wife let it be known. I have the craziest ex wife in the world and I can beat any story you have hands down. I guarantee it and that is very disturbing. Some things will make you laugh, some things will make you cry, some things will disturb you and give you nightmares. Many of you would call social services or the police on my behalf.

I just wanted to give us all a place to vent a little. Let's keep it somewhat clean and support each other. I am sure with our various experiences we can help support a BOTL through some tough terrible times and help him keep his cool.

Hi, my name is Jake and I have a CrAzY ex-wife!

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    cabinetmakercabinetmaker Posts: 2,560 ✭✭
    My last ex gf (yea, I know, not a wife) wound up commited to a state mental institution with no idea who she was, where she was, or how she got there.
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    camgfscamgfs Posts: 968
    I could write a book!
    The good side is that I will be getting custody of one of my children thanks to the X-Wife's crazyness.

    My X-wife once wrote a check for nearly $500.00 of groceries on an account that had no where near enough to cover it (and she knew that). The grocery store was a customer of mine because I delivered their beef and other meat products at that time. My boss fired me over it. I got my job back when I brought in the check and my boss compared the signature on the check to my weekly pay stubs that I signed. She could tell right away that it was not my signature, AND I had to pay the grocery store to cover the check.

    My X-wife began hitting me one night because I mistakenly folded 'dirty laundry' with the clean stuff. It was all in one pile, so I had no idea some was clean and some wasn't.

    My X-wife told me that I was "not allowed to say hi to the dog or kids before giving her a proper Hello when I get home from work".

    . At the marriage councelor's meeting, she told the councelor that I was never home because of fishing and hunting and going to bars. My fishing/hunting license had expired 8 months earlier, and I had not been out to a bar in over 3 years!!!

    I can't thank you enough for giving me a place to vent. It's been 10 years since we broke up, and I wish it was 22!

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    fla-gypsyfla-gypsy Posts: 3,023 ✭✭
    cabinetmaker:
    My last ex gf (yea, I know, not a wife) wound up commited to a state mental institution with no idea who she was, where she was, or how she got there.
    But what part did you play in that? Just saying!
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    LukoLuko Posts: 2,003 ✭✭
    camgfs:
    I could write a book!
    The good side is that I will be getting custody of one of my children thanks to the X-Wife's crazyness.

    My X-wife once wrote a check for nearly $500.00 of groceries on an account that had no where near enough to cover it (and she knew that). The grocery store was a customer of mine because I delivered their beef and other meat products at that time. My boss fired me over it. I got my job back when I brought in the check and my boss compared the signature on the check to my weekly pay stubs that I signed. She could tell right away that it was not my signature, AND I had to pay the grocery store to cover the check.

    My X-wife began hitting me one night because I mistakenly folded 'dirty laundry' with the clean stuff. It was all in one pile, so I had no idea some was clean and some wasn't.

    My X-wife told me that I was "not allowed to say hi to the dog or kids before giving her a proper Hello when I get home from work".

    . At the marriage councelor's meeting, she told the councelor that I was never home because of fishing and hunting and going to bars. My fishing/hunting license had expired 8 months earlier, and I had not been out to a bar in over 3 years!!!

    I can't thank you enough for giving me a place to vent. It's been 10 years since we broke up, and I wish it was 22!

    I do believe the guantlet has been thrown down. Can you out-crazy that, Snake?
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    gdsim1gdsim1 Posts: 213
    cabinetmaker:
    My last ex gf (yea, I know, not a wife) wound up commited to a state mental institution with no idea who she was, where she was, or how she got there.
    D@MN, cabbie must be bringing the SERIOUS mojo... :-D

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    pnaylonpnaylon Posts: 214
    I have an ex who's a hardcore (girl who likes other girls)...does that count? lol

    Haha L3sbian got censored.
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    sightunseensightunseen Posts: 2,130 ✭✭
    pnaylon:
    I have an ex who's a hardcore (girl who likes other girls)...does that count? lol

    Haha L3sbian got censored.
    That's crazy in a good way, unless she was also trying to stab you as well.
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    GoldyGoldy Posts: 1,638 ✭✭
    pnaylon:
    I have an ex who's a hardcore (girl who likes other girls)...does that count? lol

    Haha L3sbian got censored.

    My first ever girlfriend dumped me for another girl and so did my last girlfriend before I met my wife.
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    TatuajeVITatuajeVI Posts: 2,378
    Goldy:
    pnaylon:
    I have an ex who's a hardcore (girl who likes other girls)...does that count? lol

    Haha L3sbian got censored.

    My first ever girlfriend dumped me for another girl and so did my last girlfriend before I met my wife.
    Wow, that's really messed up. lol.
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    pnaylonpnaylon Posts: 214
    Goldy:
    pnaylon:
    I have an ex who's a hardcore (girl who likes other girls)...does that count? lol

    Haha L3sbian got censored.

    My first ever girlfriend dumped me for another girl and so did my last girlfriend before I met my wife.
    Haha weve got a way with the ladies!
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    fla-gypsyfla-gypsy Posts: 3,023 ✭✭
    I bet that will make you check your man card!
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    jsnakejsnake Posts: 5,979 ✭✭✭✭✭
    I can top any story here. I actually wrote out a long ordeal on my Blackberry but when I tried to post it it wouldn't post. I am too busy to get involved in writing all this out and telling you guys of my hell. I will share more later. I haven't been home for more than 12 hours at a time in the past week and things are crazy.
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    JZJZ Posts: 827
    pnaylon:
    I have an ex who's a hardcore (girl who likes other girls)...does that count? lol

    Haha L3sbian got censored.
    That's not crazy, thats HOT! LMAO!
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    sightunseensightunseen Posts: 2,130 ✭✭
    JZ:
    pnaylon:
    I have an ex who's a hardcore (girl who likes other girls)...does that count? lol

    Haha L3sbian got censored.
    That's not crazy, thats HOT! LMAO!
    Yes. But then a thought occured to me...when you say "hardcore," are you saying awesome hardcore like Jenna Jameson or hardcore like flannel with Wolverine steel-toed boots and a mullet?
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    doromathdoromath Posts: 576
    Hello, my name is Dan and I have a crazy ex-wife.

    I have stories...I'm not sure they would top JSnake's, but I bet I could give almost anyone a run for their money.

    I'm not one to air my dirty laundry publicly though, so I'm not keen on posting them here. However, at any future herfs I may make it to I would be more than happy to share some of my stories over a stogie and a handfull of single malt.

    To the other BOTLs here with crazy ex-wives, or those working through that process: I feel your pain. Just know that life gets better when you make it better.
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    DiamondogDiamondog Posts: 4,169
    I'd like to make my wife an X-wife............
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    gdsim1gdsim1 Posts: 213
    sightunseen:
    JZ:
    pnaylon:
    I have an ex who's a hardcore (girl who likes other girls)...does that count? lol

    Haha L3sbian got censored.
    That's not crazy, thats HOT! LMAO!
    Yes. But then a thought occured to me...when you say "hardcore," are you saying awesome hardcore like Jenna Jameson or hardcore like flannel with Wolverine steel-toed boots and a mullet?
    Im gonna guess he DIDNT mean like Jenna J... or she probably wouldnt be an ex... :-)

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    pnaylonpnaylon Posts: 214
    gdsim1:
    sightunseen:
    JZ:
    pnaylon:
    I have an ex who's a hardcore (girl who likes other girls)...does that count? lol

    Haha L3sbian got censored.
    That's not crazy, thats HOT! LMAO!
    Yes. But then a thought occured to me...when you say "hardcore," are you saying awesome hardcore like Jenna Jameson or hardcore like flannel with Wolverine steel-toed boots and a mullet?
    Im gonna guess he DIDNT mean like Jenna J... or she probably wouldnt be an ex... :-)

    s=g Haha she was pretty cute! and she didnt shave her head or anything crazy. I tihnk she got drunk at a party after we broke up and hooked up with a girl and theyve been in a relationship ever since...6 months maybe? Good times

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    gdsim1gdsim1 Posts: 213
    pnaylon:
    gdsim1:
    sightunseen:
    JZ:
    pnaylon:
    I have an ex who's a hardcore (girl who likes other girls)...does that count? lol

    Haha L3sbian got censored.
    That's not crazy, thats HOT! LMAO!
    Yes. But then a thought occured to me...when you say "hardcore," are you saying awesome hardcore like Jenna Jameson or hardcore like flannel with Wolverine steel-toed boots and a mullet?
    Im gonna guess he DIDNT mean like Jenna J... or she probably wouldnt be an ex... :-)

    s=g Haha she was pretty cute! and she didnt shave her head or anything crazy. I tihnk she got drunk at a party after we broke up and hooked up with a girl and theyve been in a relationship ever since...6 months maybe? Good times

    Took care of her so well that no MAN could satisfy her after you huh Patrick?

    ... yup, thats an engineer for ya! :-)

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    pnaylonpnaylon Posts: 214
    gdsim1:
    pnaylon:
    gdsim1:
    sightunseen:
    JZ:
    pnaylon:
    I have an ex who's a hardcore (girl who likes other girls)...does that count? lol

    Haha L3sbian got censored.
    That's not crazy, thats HOT! LMAO!
    Yes. But then a thought occured to me...when you say "hardcore," are you saying awesome hardcore like Jenna Jameson or hardcore like flannel with Wolverine steel-toed boots and a mullet?
    Im gonna guess he DIDNT mean like Jenna J... or she probably wouldnt be an ex... :-)

    s=g Haha she was pretty cute! and she didnt shave her head or anything crazy. I tihnk she got drunk at a party after we broke up and hooked up with a girl and theyve been in a relationship ever since...6 months maybe? Good times

    Took care of her so well that no MAN could satisfy her after you huh Patrick?

    ... yup, thats an engineer for ya! :-)

    Bhahahahahahaha I like your thinking!!!
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    zoom6zoomzoom6zoom Posts: 1,214
    sightunseen:
    pnaylon:
    I have an ex who's a hardcore (girl who likes other girls)...does that count? lol

    Haha L3sbian got censored.
    That's why you need other words, too. Let's see if Vagitarian goes through.
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    Garen BGaren B Posts: 977
    I'm too young to have an ex wife, but I was cruising around the interweb and found this site and thought you guys with bat **** nuts ex wives would enjoy this.
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    I might share my story one day...lets just say it was definitely a tough one...but life goes on and I have a 11 week old little girl and a beautiful wife who loves the heck out of me...until I smoke a cigar. Oh well, can't have everything heh.
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    YankeeManYankeeMan Posts: 2,654 ✭✭✭✭✭
    I have two ex-wives. As I said before, cops are serial marriers. Lots of stories, none of which I can share.

    Besides, giving away everything you own every so often keeps you humble!
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