Not a Happy Camper

jsnakejsnake Kansas CityPosts: 5,796 ✭✭✭✭✭
My ex-wife is a psycho and we have 2 kids together. She is remarried to a decent guy and they have 2 kids together. Neither one of them works. Now they are having a third kid so she decides she needs more child support from me to support their new kid and asks the state to re-evaluate it of course free of charge for her. I quit a very successful and decorated career in law enforcement, a dream job that I loved, and found a better paying job with better benefits so my current wife and I could start a family.

So now according to the state they are going to increase my child support from $800 to $1200 a month and punish me for all of my hard work I have done. I have been working my butt off to try to catch back up on bills so now I get punished for that too. How the *** is this *** right? I am not the only man to be screwed by the system but this is ridiculous. I get reimbursed for meals and mileage and they are going to count it as my pay. back in February my wife and I were getting food stamps. *** *** ***

Anyways if I am not on here much it is because I am going to have to get a third job if I can find one. Of course they will just take more money for that too. We are going to be forced to sell our home which is really fair to my wife and kids. The state gives a crap though. Needless to say I probably won't be participating in many more games and/or trades. Those guys who have been super kind to me I haven't forgotten you. I can't buy any more cigars for awhile and I am not sure how long my current stash will last me. I just can't send any stuff out. I am going to keep plugging away for 262 Cigars as much as I can. I have reviews for thecigarnut.com and we are lucky to have a few big sponsors. My buddy David takes good care of me with sticks for review. I am just really frustrated. Have a lot more I want to say about this bullshit system aimed and **** good fathers who work hard. The harder I work the more I get hammered for. Makes working hard pointless IMO. I already take real good care of my kids. I want to go back to being a cop.
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Comments

  • Jetmech_63Jetmech_63 Posts: 3,454 ✭✭✭
    Put a few pounds of weed in her trunk and drop an anonymous police tip on her.
  • jship079jship079 Posts: 621
    Can you file an appeal? Did you ever think about fighting her for custody so they can pay you child support?
  • roland_7707roland_7707 Posts: 2,834 ✭✭✭
    Dude, that sucks. Any system that rewards people for being lazy @ss*holes is busted, and they don't help the hard working people that have jobs. prayers for you and yours man.
    One God, One Truth
  • Sucks! But I agree with Jship..get in court and start fighting for your rights bro. If you have the jobs, and are making the money..make the state reconsider the custody since you obviously can give your kids a better life. Law enforcement is a wonderful career, but for some reason it attracts crazy women and divorces like white on rice. I'm also remarried but luckily I never had kids with the first nutcase I married. Praying for you man!
  • Im sorry to hear that brotha!!....My prayers are out there for you and your family. Stay strong and you will get threw all this fckin bllshit. Stav
  • vegassparkyvegassparky Posts: 365
    Good luck brother. i feel your pain. i too went throught a ruff time with my ex and the state sticking there hand in my check. I lost everything and had to start over. That was three years ago, and now i am on easy street. I have re married, for three months now, and my ex is in alot of hot water. Keep your head up and dont give up the fight.
  • zoom6zoomzoom6zoom Posts: 1,214
    How can even the looniest liberal socialist justify someone having to pay support for someone else's kid?
  • jship079jship079 Posts: 621
    zoom6zoom:
    How can even the looniest liberal socialist justify someone having to pay support for someone else's kid?
    They are not making him pay more because she had another kid she filed for a review since he makes more money the more you make the more you pay(STILL BULLSH*&)
  • jsnakejsnake Kansas CityPosts: 5,796 ✭✭✭✭✭
    jship079:
    Can you file an appeal? Did you ever think about fighting her for custody so they can pay you child support?
    I can file an appeal but I have this thing called a **** which automatically means I lose. In the state of Missouri crack whores get to keep their children. A woman has to give the kids up or go to prison for a man to get custody. Not to mention if I am going for custody most lawyers here want $1500 to $2000 retainer. To even get an attorney to talk to me they want $100 an hour for consultation. The system is BS. When this originally took place I was making $12.14 an hour and they took $800 a month from me. I had $400 a month left to live off of and to give my kids a home. But the state and the judges all determined that was fair.
  • wwhwangwwhwang Ottawa, ON, CanadaPosts: 2,878 ✭✭✭
    I'm sorry to hear about this bullshit, man. Unforunately, I don't know anything about Missouri state law. But honestly, if you there's a friend that specializes in marriage and civil law, it's best to ask them. I'll be praying for you. Especially since the third kid isn't even yours to raise.
  • jsnakejsnake Kansas CityPosts: 5,796 ✭✭✭✭✭
    wwhwang:
    I'm sorry to hear about this bullshit, man. Unforunately, I don't know anything about Missouri state law. But honestly, if you there's a friend that specializes in marriage and civil law, it's best to ask them. I'll be praying for you. Especially since the third kid isn't even yours to raise.
    To clarify the state isn't making me pay for that kid. That is why she is doing this. Since I am in a better position and work my rear end off now to catch up on bills I will get screwed. They don't care about overtime or special circumstances. They don't care I lived in my car and got laid off. They don't care I will be in a bad position this winter again like every year. AAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHH
  • Joeyjoe21_8Joeyjoe21_8 Posts: 2,048
    You cant hire an attorny to fight a appeal for this? Also, you may be just better off to get full custody of your kids from her by claiming she is not "working and not fulfilling her parental rights"....get a lawyer and take ur kids back and then you dont have any child support to pay. But i am sorry to hear about it all bro!
  • Russ55Russ55 Posts: 2,765
    Give it to her all in pennies from now on.
  • The SniperThe Sniper Posts: 3,910
    jsnake:
    jship079:
    Can you file an appeal? Did you ever think about fighting her for custody so they can pay you child support?
    I can file an appeal but I have this thing called a **** which automatically means I lose. In the state of Missouri crack whores get to keep their children. A woman has to give the kids up or go to prison for a man to get custody. Not to mention if I am going for custody most lawyers here want $1500 to $2000 retainer. To even get an attorney to talk to me they want $100 an hour for consultation. The system is BS. When this originally took place I was making $12.14 an hour and they took $800 a month from me. I had $400 a month left to live off of and to give my kids a home. But the state and the judges all determined that was fair.
    Jsnake, this is coming from the heart bro - Im sorry. MO is absolutely horrid when it comes to fathers and ANYTHING having to do with divorce, whether you're talking custody, support, visitation, WHATEVER. Would you moving out of the state do you any good in the fight? And for Christ's sake DONT go to KS - from what I hear they're even worse!
  • jsnakejsnake Kansas CityPosts: 5,796 ✭✭✭✭✭
    The Sniper:
    jsnake:
    jship079:
    Can you file an appeal? Did you ever think about fighting her for custody so they can pay you child support?
    I can file an appeal but I have this thing called a **** which automatically means I lose. In the state of Missouri crack whores get to keep their children. A woman has to give the kids up or go to prison for a man to get custody. Not to mention if I am going for custody most lawyers here want $1500 to $2000 retainer. To even get an attorney to talk to me they want $100 an hour for consultation. The system is BS. When this originally took place I was making $12.14 an hour and they took $800 a month from me. I had $400 a month left to live off of and to give my kids a home. But the state and the judges all determined that was fair.
    Jsnake, this is coming from the heart bro - Im sorry. MO is absolutely horrid when it comes to fathers and ANYTHING having to do with divorce, whether you're talking custody, support, visitation, WHATEVER. Would you moving out of the state do you any good in the fight? And for Christ's sake DONT go to KS - from what I hear they're even worse!
    Missouri is horrible. If my kids go to college I have to keep paying her until the turn 22 or 23. How the hell does that make sense? I am waiting to hear back from an attorney that I knew when I was a cop. He helps out law enforcement guys on the cheap even though he works for a major law firm in KC. I am going to see what he says. There is so much to this I can't say it all here. I want custody but my boys want to stay with her because they get to play video games all day and night, no chores, no responsibilities, and they are terrified of her. Imagine living with someone who is miserable 24 hours a day and makes everyone else miserable by yelling, screaming, cussing, and threats. I thought the first time we went to court I would get custody especially after all the testimony and couldn't believe I didn't. My kids missed 30 days of school one semester and were tardy 20 days. That doesn't include the rest of the school year. So much more....... my head hurts....... Stay tuned.

    I will keep posting even if I can't do all the fun stuff. I like it here too much.
  • JSaintJSaint Orfordville, WIPosts: 1,879 ✭✭✭
    That sucks so much bro. I hope that lawyer can help you out.
    "Beauty is in the eye when you hold her." -Ricky
  • surfingzeekosurfingzeeko Posts: 628
    I'm sorry to hear about that man.
  • vegassparkyvegassparky Posts: 365
    Just feel sorry for the brother. when it comes to kids ,dads normally lose. TRUST ME ! three years ago my then wife started fights over nothing everyday. came home from work one day and she told me she wanted to split up. i moved out of my house,that i had before i married her. A week later i went by to leave roses for her. when i got to the door, the locks were changed. when i got my kids that weekend the oldest told me some guy moved in 4 days after i moved out. i raised her oldest son for seven years and we had a 4 year old together. i paid the morgage and child support for 6 months before we got a court date. she wanted 50 % of my income and the judge wanted to know why. my name wasnt on the birth certificate for the youngest, because we werent married when he was born. so the state of nevada wont put the fathers name on till you do alot of paperwork. well the judge ordered a D.N.A. test. that is when my life went down hill. It turned out the 4 year old wasnt mine. So the judge thru the case out and said she wasnt getting any money. i tried to talk to her, i wanted the boys in my life, i was dad. She told me to F off. and i havent seen the boys in 3 years. The state said she doesnt owe me the money back for the 6 months child support and i couldnt throw her ass out of my house, so the state bought the house. they gave me less than market value and i barely could pay it off so i could move on. I still miss the boys and i have all there toys and clothes stored away . so if i ever see them again i can give them there old toys and underwear. that was three years ago like i said. i have moved on and remarried. I hope you make it thru, god knows i hated not seeing my kids everyday. they may have not been mine physically...but mentally they will always have my heart
  • Joeyjoe21_8Joeyjoe21_8 Posts: 2,048
    makes me not want to get married or just have a AIRTIGHT PRENUP! lol but im sorry for both of ur loses....women are **** and yet they win in court every time
  • vegassparkyvegassparky Posts: 365
    Joeyjoe21_8:
    makes me not want to get married or just have a AIRTIGHT PRENUP! lol but im sorry for both of ur loses....women are **** and yet they win in court every time
    easy joey! you know i bounced back. I married a doctor the second time around. life is good now. and she smokes with me some times.... go ahead and feel sorry, but i got the easy road the second time around...and it is sweet
  • Joeyjoe21_8Joeyjoe21_8 Posts: 2,048
    yeah i know....congrats of course...lol..but the first time sounds brutal! lol
  • jsnakejsnake Kansas CityPosts: 5,796 ✭✭✭✭✭
    vegassparky:
    Just feel sorry for the brother. when it comes to kids ,dads normally lose. TRUST ME ! three years ago my then wife started fights over nothing everyday. came home from work one day and she told me she wanted to split up. i moved out of my house,that i had before i married her. A week later i went by to leave roses for her. when i got to the door, the locks were changed. when i got my kids that weekend the oldest told me some guy moved in 4 days after i moved out. i raised her oldest son for seven years and we had a 4 year old together. i paid the morgage and child support for 6 months before we got a court date. she wanted 50 % of my income and the judge wanted to know why. my name wasnt on the birth certificate for the youngest, because we werent married when he was born. so the state of nevada wont put the fathers name on till you do alot of paperwork. well the judge ordered a D.N.A. test. that is when my life went down hill. It turned out the 4 year old wasnt mine. So the judge thru the case out and said she wasnt getting any money. i tried to talk to her, i wanted the boys in my life, i was dad. She told me to F off. and i havent seen the boys in 3 years. The state said she doesnt owe me the money back for the 6 months child support and i couldnt throw her ass out of my house, so the state bought the house. they gave me less than market value and i barely could pay it off so i could move on. I still miss the boys and i have all there toys and clothes stored away . so if i ever see them again i can give them there old toys and underwear. that was three years ago like i said. i have moved on and remarried. I hope you make it thru, god knows i hated not seeing my kids everyday. they may have not been mine physically...but mentally they will always have my heart
    Wow man! So amazing how many "screwed over" stories. Most states don't allow re-payment in child support when you find out the kid(s) aren't yours. I tested my youngest son with her and I was scared. What if he wasn't mine? I was his dad. I love him no matter what. There was a lot of crazy emotions. Turns out he is mine and I had serious doubts. I am glad to hear things got better for you.
  • cabinetmakercabinetmaker Posts: 2,561
    I'm living on the other end of all that. My fiance has 2 kids by 2 other guys both of whom are worthless. I'm paying for thier kids, but it's worth it, IMO, because I reap all the benefits as well. Hang in there and see what that lawer says, maybe it'll be some good news.
  • The SniperThe Sniper Posts: 3,910
    cabinetmaker:
    I'm living on the other end of all that. My fiance has 2 kids by 2 other guys both of whom are worthless. I'm paying for thier kids, but it's worth it, IMO, because I reap all the benefits as well. Hang in there and see what that lawer says, maybe it'll be some good news.
    Good on you Cabby. Its been said that any fool with a **** can be a father, but it takes a real man to be a DAD! :-D Good that those two kids have you in their lives as a positive role model.
  • jihiggsjihiggs Posts: 468
    "Put a few pounds of weed in her trunk and drop an anonymous police tip on her. " rofl, I was just about to post that, but I was going to say couple keys of coke in her spare tire.
  • jsnakejsnake Kansas CityPosts: 5,796 ✭✭✭✭✭
    My idea has always been a rolling meth lab lol
  • cabinetmakercabinetmaker Posts: 2,561
    jsnake:
    My idea has always been a rolling meth lab lol
    That would be your cheapest option, l.e. comes down hard on meth.



    Not that I'm advocating such an action....
  • surfingzeekosurfingzeeko Posts: 628
    evidence locker...lol
  • gmill880gmill880 Posts: 5,947
    That totally sucks Jsnake ! Prayers to ya my brother .
  • lilwing88lilwing88 ChitownPosts: 2,812 ✭✭✭
    It really sucks, jsnake. My heart goes out to you and your kids. And vegassparky's story is pretty messed up too!!

    In my line of work I unfortunately get to witness, first hand, the dirty side of divorce and custody battles. All I can say is that there never is a perfect solution to these things. But 9 times out of 10, the guy usually gets the shaft. Especially if you live in an "non-at-fault" state. And 10 times out of 10, the kids get screwed....
    Guns don't kill people, Daddies with pretty daughters do…..
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