Bolstering my nerd and cigar fiend cred, one lame program at a time.

For some reason, I decided to write a program to smoke cigars for you! In all actuality, I was actually goofing with subroutines for those who care, but for those who don't, maybe you'll still appreciate it:

#!/usr/bin/perl print "Go ahead and list some cigars you have on hand and ready to smoke. Once done, hit ctrl+d on the keyboard. "; chomp(@humidor = ); for $cigar (@humidor) { &smoke($cigar); } sub smoke { print " MMMmmm... this @_ sure looks tasty! "; sleep 1; print "*snips the head; not too much, but not too little; that's a perfect draw!* "; sleep 1; print "*gently toasts the foot* "; sleep 1; print "*blows on the foot to ensure that it's lit evenly* "; sleep 1; print "*enjoys* "; }

Example input and output:

Go ahead and list some cigars you have on hand and ready to smoke. Once done, hit ctrl+d on the keyboard. Cohiba Padilla 5 Vegas Nub MMMmmm... this Cohiba sure looks tasty! *snips the head; not too much, but not too little; that's a perfect draw!* *gently toasts the foot* *blows on the foot to ensure that it's lit evenly* *enjoys* MMMmmm... this Padilla sure looks tasty! *snips the head; not too much, but not too little; that's a perfect draw!* *gently toasts the foot* *blows on the foot to ensure that it's lit evenly* *enjoys* MMMmmm... this 5 Vegas sure looks tasty! *snips the head; not too much, but not too little; that's a perfect draw!* *gently toasts the foot* *blows on the foot to ensure that it's lit evenly* *enjoys* MMMmmm... this Nub sure looks tasty! *snips the head; not too much, but not too little; that's a perfect draw!* *gently toasts the foot* *blows on the foot to ensure that it's lit evenly* *enjoys*

Comments

  • Haha, that's pretty cool dude. If you're really bored, can you make an inventory program with snmp oids that's compatible with cacti and runs on freebsd? I would love to make me some graphs and stuff. Kind of similar to wine tracker.
    "There's three parts to making a great cigar. There's the science and the know-how, the experience. There's the art, which is the judgment call, that feel that you know exactly what to do. But there's something else: the inspiration. And I consider that very spiritual."

  • ShotgunJohnShotgunJohn Lakewood WAPosts: 1,545 ✭✭
    Awesome, I have been thinking about creating an Cigar Inventory program for myself with c# and SQL Server, I just need to find time.
  • LasabarLasabar Posts: 4,473 ✭✭✭
    The "Geek" shall inherit the earth... Or it may seem like that because everyone else is just really confused
  • JudoChinXJudoChinX Posts: 775
    james40:
    Haha, that's pretty cool dude. If you're really bored, can you make an inventory program with snmp oids that's compatible with cacti and runs on freebsd? I would love to make me some graphs and stuff. Kind of similar to wine tracker.
    Haha. Someone (me) just got outgeeked. I'm just barely getting into programming, but this isn't a half bad project to shoot for once I get database support down.
  • JudoChinXJudoChinX Posts: 775
    ShotgunJohn:
    Awesome, I have been thinking about creating an Cigar Inventory program for myself with c# and SQL Server, I just need to find time.
    It's a nice feeling knowing that I'm not the only computer guy around here. We must unite under a common interest: cigars!
  • JudoChinX:
    james40:
    Haha, that's pretty cool dude. If you're really bored, can you make an inventory program with snmp oids that's compatible with cacti and runs on freebsd? I would love to make me some graphs and stuff. Kind of similar to wine tracker.
    Haha. Someone (me) just got outgeeked. I'm just barely getting into programming, but this isn't a half bad project to shoot for once I get database support down.
    haha, hardly bro. I only talked about something, you actually wrote code. I'm in your geek shadow and it's cold man, so cold. :-)
    "There's three parts to making a great cigar. There's the science and the know-how, the experience. There's the art, which is the judgment call, that feel that you know exactly what to do. But there's something else: the inspiration. And I consider that very spiritual."

  • ShotgunJohnShotgunJohn Lakewood WAPosts: 1,545 ✭✭
    JudoChinX:
    ShotgunJohn:
    Awesome, I have been thinking about creating an Cigar Inventory program for myself with c# and SQL Server, I just need to find time.
    It's a nice feeling knowing that I'm not the only computer guy around here. We must unite under a common interest: cigars!
    +1
  • sightunseensightunseen Posts: 2,130
    Haha, not a computer programmer, but I appreciate the humor.
  • JonathanEJonathanE Posts: 401
    Seriously guys, I'm LMAO! Someone should introduce you to Excel! It's so much easier!

    I have to admit though, that's pretty impressive. I would never have thought of doing something like that!

    JDE

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