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wetter than an otter's pocket
Just yesterday I got to complaining how my sotweed cylinders keep multiplying out of control. I suspect that when I close the box there must be monkey business going on. So today, naturally, I went looking for a cigar store I had never heard of. One which Paul Stulac had mentioned as being here in Dull-Aware and about to carry his cigars. Yeah. Right. Turns out its cigs, paraphernalia, and lottery tickets. But on the way back, I spotted a cigar store I had never noticed before. So, naturally, I dropped in. Get where I'm going with this? What do you do when you have too many cigars? You go buy more for no good reason. But I digress. Let me re-focus. Ahem.
Off to the side of the main cigarette cartons, paraphernalia, and lottery tickets in this second store, they have a small walk in humidor with a creditable selection. I very nearly pulled the trigger on a mazo of 25 Perdomo Fresco Maduros. Lucky I spotted a single in the bin below, because I have zero clue where I'd stash another 25. As I bend down to fetch that single, my rear pockets get blasted by a roar of vapor from a horrifying humidifying machine. I crab walk down the aisle and almost pull the trigger on a mazo of San Lo. Lucky I spotted a single in the bin below because you know I got no room. As I bend down to fetch this single I get blasted in the keister by a second such machine. I look round the second aisle, there's another blaster. I look up, there's another blaster. Four master blasters in a space smaller than the office I am writing this from, a space only large enough for two short aisles. And this is in Dull-Aware, where the humidibbiditty does not skimp on a good day in Summer. I'm telling you, I think they surplussed these machines from an NFL pre-season sidelines, cause they were misting a mile a minute. Industrial wetter downers. This place was even thicker than the John Hay factory store in Intercourse. Air wetter than an otter's pocket. I believe I spotted some lightning where thunderclouds were forming near the display of cutters, so I dodged out of there in a funk.
It appears to me that one day long ago some well meaning cigar geek in parched Phoenix Arizona wrote a casual remark how cigars need to be humidified, and ever since then certain perfunctory readers from Dewey Beach to Atlanta and round about to Nawlins all remain firmly convinced that when it comes to cigars, the wetter the better.
Off to the side of the main cigarette cartons, paraphernalia, and lottery tickets in this second store, they have a small walk in humidor with a creditable selection. I very nearly pulled the trigger on a mazo of 25 Perdomo Fresco Maduros. Lucky I spotted a single in the bin below, because I have zero clue where I'd stash another 25. As I bend down to fetch that single, my rear pockets get blasted by a roar of vapor from a horrifying humidifying machine. I crab walk down the aisle and almost pull the trigger on a mazo of San Lo. Lucky I spotted a single in the bin below because you know I got no room. As I bend down to fetch this single I get blasted in the keister by a second such machine. I look round the second aisle, there's another blaster. I look up, there's another blaster. Four master blasters in a space smaller than the office I am writing this from, a space only large enough for two short aisles. And this is in Dull-Aware, where the humidibbiditty does not skimp on a good day in Summer. I'm telling you, I think they surplussed these machines from an NFL pre-season sidelines, cause they were misting a mile a minute. Industrial wetter downers. This place was even thicker than the John Hay factory store in Intercourse. Air wetter than an otter's pocket. I believe I spotted some lightning where thunderclouds were forming near the display of cutters, so I dodged out of there in a funk.
It appears to me that one day long ago some well meaning cigar geek in parched Phoenix Arizona wrote a casual remark how cigars need to be humidified, and ever since then certain perfunctory readers from Dewey Beach to Atlanta and round about to Nawlins all remain firmly convinced that when it comes to cigars, the wetter the better.
“It has been a source of great pain to me to have met with so many among [my] opponents who had not the liberality to distinguish between political and social opposition; who transferred at once to the person, the hatred they bore to his political opinions.” —Thomas Jefferson (1808)
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I'm not making excuses though, it only takes a quick check from anyone in the store to see if it's too humid. Most well maintained humis I've been in don't really "feel" that humid when you walk in.. yeah you can tell, but its not like a rainforest or anything even close.
on another note, I believe I've also been the victim of a humidor which had the "wrong" kind if cedar lining it. You know, the kind that keeps moths from eating your clothes... it burned my eyes just like naphthalene too.
Think I'll dry this stick out before lighting.
Preheat oven to 450.
Place stick on ungreased pan. Place on center rack.
Bake for 7 1/2 days, turning stick over half way through cooking for even baking.
88%!?! That's insane!
2) They have stuff which my fave B&M doesn't. Dropped by my fave just last night, on the way to the Y. Asked about the Perdomo Fresco. They used to carry it, but don't now.
3) By the time I drop by my fave B&M, I wind up late for my handball match.
Four wall handball, guys. You gotta try it. Baddest game in town.
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On the other hand, when I dropped by my fave, the geek advised me to pick up a few things they have on clearance. He never steers me wrong. So i grabbed a La Aurora Barrel Aged, a Cusano Habano, and a Cubao Maduro to try. All robustos, each only four bucks on clearance. Really looking forward to the barrel thing. Aged in a rum bartrel. Looks yummy.
I can't get that advice at Otter's Pocket, where obviously nobody knows a cigar from a lottery ticket.
just something like asking who runs the place or when they'd be in, and then say "hey, now this is just my opinion, but I smoke plenty of cigars and I believe you may want to turn that hing down a notch" maybe mentioning possibly ruining his inventory would work too. All just friendly tips..
or maybe its not even worth asking about... I probably would if it was a place I planned on visiting somewhat often... who knows, maybe they just never knew
And plus, I always get a kick out of this shop because, well, it's friggin huge!!! They have 2 walk-ins that cover about 4 rooms, along with a couple other wall-sized humidors. But I'll focus on their main walk-in humidor (where this story takes place, and plus that's my favorite humi because it has all the delicious singles out on display)...but it's probably 40x15ish sq ft.
So I get to lookin around for a couple minutes, then all of the sudden it feels and looks like I'm wandering through the tropical rainforest!!! WHOA WTF is happening??
Well I glance around and notice an R2-D2 sized box in the corner, with a 4 inch PVC pipe sticking out the top with a 90 degree elbow so the opening was pointing straight into the room....I can only assume it's name was "fog humidifier 9000." Because it was making this walk-in more foggy than the scenes from the 2007 film adaptation of Stephen King's The Mist!!!
Seriously, WHOA!! The local disco would be jealous of this thing !!! Must've had a hemi engine in it or something the way it was spewing out water vapor....idk.
Now keep in mind this is a pretty good sized walk-in but this thing seemed like overkill, seriously. So I thought "what are you people doing, you're gonna ruin the smokes!!"
So I picked up a couple sticks from the shelf,,, well they didn't feel soggy and there were no signs of mold, so I went ahead and bought them ---- going to leave them out in the sun for a few days to dry out though (I jest)!!!!
This B&M has always been tops in my book, killer selection, good prices, and relatively close....but after seeing the "Fogger 9000" at work, IDK, going to have to see how these few smoke before I take a trip back.
So I guess what I'm gettin at is that Davis' shop isn't the only one that believes in the "more humidity = better" theory.
* I have a new address as of 3/24/18 *
But on the plus side ... if my RH ever rapidly drops, I'll just stop in and grab a couple singles from that shop --- toss them in the humi and I'm sure the RH will be back up in no time.
Who needs those stinkin Boveda packets?? They're for schmucks --- just get a couple sponges ... err I mean singles ... from the fogger 9000 and you'll be good to go!!! haha
* I have a new address as of 3/24/18 *
I like Oliva and Quesada (including Regius) a lot. I will smoke anything, though.
Just punt, and call it an otter's pocket. The rest of us will know what you munt.
Oh, to taste my youth once more,
When frolicking kelpies swam ashore
All taut skin, and rippling abs,
And otters' pockets worth the crabs.