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A mechanic has to have a sense of humor.

0patience0patience Oregon CoastPosts: 9,341 ✭✭✭✭✭
Service request: Transmission can't find 2nd gear.
Mechanic reply: Transmission knows where 2nd gear is. Driver can't find second gear. Not a mechanical problem.

Service request: Engine missing.
Mechanic reply: Found engine under hood.

Service request: brake pedal on floor not releasing.
Mechanic reply: Housekeeping problem. Cleaned out sunflower seeds stuck under pedal.

Service request: squeaking noise under seat.
Mechanic reply: Fed mouse sunflower seats from under brake pedal. Mouse happy. No more squeaking.

Service request: Hazard light switch doesn't seem to be working.
Mechanic reply: Driver was using wrong switch. Problem was a disconnect between driver brain and truck.
There is no crisis that a good cigar can't cure.
In Fumo Pax
Money can't buy happiness, but it can buy cigars and that's close enough.

Wylaff said:
Atmospheric pressure and crap.

Comments

  • ToombesToombes Posts: 4,506 ✭✭✭
    Snicker.... Giggle... Chuckle.... Teeheehee...
  • firetruckguyfiretruckguy Greeley, ColoradoPosts: 2,529 ✭✭✭
    0patience:
    Service request: Transmission can't find 2nd gear.
    Mechanic reply: Transmission knows where 2nd gear is. Driver can't find second gear. Not a mechanical problem.

    Service request: Engine missing.
    Mechanic reply: Found engine under hood.

    Service request: brake pedal on floor not releasing.
    Mechanic reply: Housekeeping problem. Cleaned out sunflower seeds stuck under pedal.

    Service request: squeaking noise under seat.
    Mechanic reply: Fed mouse sunflower seats from under brake pedal. Mouse happy. No more squeaking.

    Service request: Hazard light switch doesn't seem to be working.
    Mechanic reply: Driver was using wrong switch. Problem was a disconnect between driver brain and truck.
    So frigg'in true..........
  • RBeckomRBeckom Home or out and about somewhere.Posts: 2,190 ✭✭✭
    Good one!!!!!!!!!!
  • variant2variant2 <---- Don't Believe Him!Posts: 837 ✭✭✭✭
    Gotta love some car owners...

    I spoofed an email from BMW to a lady friend of mine that she needs to bring her car to the dealership in order to replace the "Flux Capacitor".

    She went, they laughed, she told us about it, we laughed, she found out I sent her the email and I got one of the worst nipple twisters.

    Was worth the pain.

    Cнeerѕ! Moтнerғυcĸer
  • RBeckomRBeckom Home or out and about somewhere.Posts: 2,190 ✭✭✭
    Try this one, real story.
    We send our 2002 Chevy Z-71 out too have the heater core replaced, in the summer mind you.
    A local shop, small and family operated.
    Well surprise, surprise.
    We get it back with the heater working perfectly but the air conditioner no longer worked!
    They claimed they would right they're wrong but seeing as they broke several retaining clips pulling on the dash board instead of removing it as promised, naturally we are reluctant to return to the same shop and yet another Summer quickly approaches!


  • ToombesToombes Posts: 4,506 ✭✭✭
    I was once the proud owner of a 2000 Nissan Frontier crew-cab P/U. Bought it in late winter and had a blast in the snow. Summer came and I quickly discovered the A/C wasn't working. Off to the dealership!
    The compressor was fully charged and functioning properly according to their equipment, but no cold air I the cab. They opted to replace the compressor and condenser, just to be safe. The warranty covered it so I wasn't concerned. When they removed the hoses, somehow a worker at the factory had managed to hook everything up with several of the plastic plugs still in the fittings! If you've never I taken the task of replacing said components, I'll tell you that it takes some serious dedication to put AN fittings together without stripping them if a plug or cap is still on it...
  • Jetmech_63Jetmech_63 Posts: 3,454 ✭✭✭
    Toombes:
    ...managed to hook everything up with several of the plastic plugs still in the fittings! If you've never I taken the task of replacing said components, I'll tell you that it takes some serious dedication to put AN fittings together without stripping them if a plug or cap is still on it...

    Dude, I work on planes(Navy Super Hornets) and we chased a gripe for almost 4 months before we realized it was a plug in a line like that! We never thought of it because it just one of those "there's no way someone is that stupid" type things... We tracked down the guy who did it and made sure he had a bad day :)
  • Jetmech_63Jetmech_63 Posts: 3,454 ✭✭✭
    Edit: double post
  • ToombesToombes Posts: 4,506 ✭✭✭
    Jetmech_63:
    Toombes:
    ...managed to hook everything up with several of the plastic plugs still in the fittings! If you've never I taken the task of replacing said components, I'll tell you that it takes some serious dedication to put AN fittings together without stripping them if a plug or cap is still on it...

    Dude, I work on planes(Navy Super Hornets) and we chased a gripe for almost 4 months before we realized it was a plug in a line like that! We never thought of it because it just one of those "there's no way someone is that stupid" type things... We tracked down the guy who did it and made sure he had a bad day :)

    Dude, I was a Hornet Handler with VFA-125 back in the day!
    Our favorite thing to do was pile up on the offender with a good old-fashioned tape job and then prop them up in the wash rack with their right hand taped to their forehead like they were saluting the pilots who taxied back to the 'line after coming in from a sortie. Ahhhh, good times, good times...
  • Lee.mcglynnLee.mcglynn HahahahaaaaaPosts: 5,993 ✭✭✭✭
    I personally like when people greak out about the check engine light and truly think the engine is going to fail soon
    Money can't buy taste
  • Jetmech_63Jetmech_63 Posts: 3,454 ✭✭✭
    No kidding! When? What was your rate? Still have 125 patches?
  • RainRain Posts: 8,960 ✭✭✭
    Lee.mcglynn:
    I personally like when people greak out about the check engine light and truly think the engine is going to fail soon
    I hate when my wife ignores it for the whole year that I'm deployed....and then her engine blows up.
  • ToombesToombes Posts: 4,506 ✭✭✭
    Jetmech_63:
    No kidding! When? What was your rate? Still have 125 patches?

    PM to ya, bro.
  • firetruckguyfiretruckguy Greeley, ColoradoPosts: 2,529 ✭✭✭
    I had a new engineer put a repair request in a couple years ago......"Engine 3 has very low power and the rear brakes a smoking horribly". My reply back to him was "next time release the parking brake ****"
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