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I am soooo screwed

MVW67MVW67 Posts: 5,591 ✭✭✭✭
OK, so some of you know I am heading outta town, well the states soon. So my wife tells me I should get out the luggage to figure out what we need... Cool right? WRONG To get to them you have to go into a spare bedroom where my cigar collection is kept, well couple months ago I had to add a container/cooler in the bedroom no thanks to YOU GUYS!!. Which is fine right? Wrong because for some unknown reason my wife came in and wants to talk.....and as she was sitting on one cooler, she looks over and sees the new one.....I'm focked at this point, as she starts in as she is looking at the rest of the containers/humis in the room. I don't remember how long that lecture was.....but long!!

FFWD. To the other day, she is getting anxious for the luggage, I tell her I will get it out in am... I go to bed, but evidently she DIDN'T I wake the next morning go down stairs and ALL the luggage is out....from under the stairs in the main room.........my stomach is instantly tied in knots and I feel sick....WHY??

Because under the stairs is another FULL COOLER! I store unopened boxes in!! Now I know there is no way she could've got the luggage with out moving that out of the way.... of course I run in there and check and sure enough it's under the stairs still. I haven't even open to check it because, I'm thinking she might have put a friendly note in it....NOT!!!! The thing is she hasn't said one word about it, I have been sleeping with one eye open just waiting.........:-)
Life is too short, live it like no tomorrow...
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    MartelMartel Posts: 3,306 ✭✭✭✭
    MVW67:
    OK, so some of you know I am heading outta town, well the states soon. So my wife tells me I should get out the luggage to figure out what we need... Cool right? WRONG To get to them you have to go into a spare bedroom where my cigar collection is kept, well couple months ago I had to add a container/cooler in the bedroom no thanks to YOU GUYS!!. Which is fine right? Wrong because for some unknown reason my wife came in and wants to talk.....and as she was sitting on one cooler, she looks over and sees the new one.....I'm focked at this point, as she starts in as she is looking at the rest of the containers/humis in the room. I don't remember how long that lecture was.....but long!!

    FFWD. To the other day, she is getting anxious for the luggage, I tell her I will get it out in am... I go to bed, but evidently she DIDN'T I wake the next morning go down stairs and ALL the luggage is out....from under the stairs in the main room.........my stomach is instantly tied in knots and I feel sick....WHY??

    Because under the stairs is another FULL COOLER! I store unopened boxes in!! Now I know there is no way she could've got the luggage with out moving that out of the way.... of course I run in there and check and sure enough it's under the stairs still. I haven't even open to check it because, I'm thinking she might have put a friendly note in it....NOT!!!! The thing is she hasn't said one word about it, I have been sleeping with one eye open just waiting.........:-)
    Good luck! Sounds like you might have to build a doghouse out of your coolers.
    Intelligence is knowing that a tomato is a fruit; wisdom is knowing not to put it in a fruit salad.

    I like Oliva and Quesada (including Regius) a lot.  I will smoke anything, though.
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    Lee.mcglynnLee.mcglynn Posts: 5,960 ✭✭✭✭
    Lmao!! Damn mike maybe she has just given up lecturing you...I doubt it but look on the bright side...just dot walk into the light
    Money can't buy taste
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    EchambersEchambers Posts: 4,178 ✭✭✭✭✭
    MVW67:
    OK, so some of you know I am heading outta town, well the states soon. So my wife tells me I should get out the luggage to figure out what we need... Cool right? WRONG To get to them you have to go into a spare bedroom where my cigar collection is kept, well couple months ago I had to add a container/cooler in the bedroom no thanks to YOU GUYS!!. Which is fine right? Wrong because for some unknown reason my wife came in and wants to talk.....and as she was sitting on one cooler, she looks over and sees the new one.....I'm focked at this point, as she starts in as she is looking at the rest of the containers/humis in the room. I don't remember how long that lecture was.....but long!!

    FFWD. To the other day, she is getting anxious for the luggage, I tell her I will get it out in am... I go to bed, but evidently she DIDN'T I wake the next morning go down stairs and ALL the luggage is out....from under the stairs in the main room.........my stomach is instantly tied in knots and I feel sick....WHY??

    Because under the stairs is another FULL COOLER! I store unopened boxes in!! Now I know there is no way she could've got the luggage with out moving that out of the way.... of course I run in there and check and sure enough it's under the stairs still. I haven't even open to check it because, I'm thinking she might have put a friendly note in it....NOT!!!! The thing is she hasn't said one word about it, I have been sleeping with one eye open just waiting.........:-)
    Sorry, man. Funny story, but sorry :-). Does this mean you are going on an allowance?
    -- "There's something that doesn't make sense. Let's go poke it with a stick."
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    BigshizzaBigshizza Posts: 15,648 ✭✭✭✭✭
    Damnnnnn I knew when you told me about the hidden one you were screwed...at least it's out in the open so to speak! Good luck! I got a room here if you need it!
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    0patience0patience Posts: 10,665 ✭✭✭✭✭
    So is that kind of like Mike coming out of the closet?
    ROFL! Sorry bro. You had to see it coming.
    In Fumo Pax
    Money can't buy happiness, but it can buy cigars and that's close enough.

    Wylaff said:
    Atmospheric pressure and crap.
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    [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 3,917
    Sounds like one of the credit cards is gonna get maxed out. Maybe some Tiffany's is in order bro???
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    Jetmech_63Jetmech_63 Posts: 3,451 ✭✭✭
    photo give-her-the-d-thumb.jpg
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    twistedstemtwistedstem Posts: 3,912 ✭✭✭✭✭
    Hey mike,thanks for holding onto all those cigars for me,if my wife knew she would kill me...-..(does that help any?).
    no matter where you go, there you are.

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    0patience0patience Posts: 10,665 ✭✭✭✭✭
    twistedstem:
    Hey mike,thanks for holding onto all those cigars for me,if my wife knew she would kill me...-..(does that help any?).
    I guess it's better than her finding the receipt for the storage facility where you keep all the rest of the cigars. LOL!
    In Fumo Pax
    Money can't buy happiness, but it can buy cigars and that's close enough.

    Wylaff said:
    Atmospheric pressure and crap.
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    No_one21No_one21 Posts: 2,182 ✭✭✭
    0patience:
    twistedstem:
    Hey mike,thanks for holding onto all those cigars for me,if my wife knew she would kill me...-..(does that help any?).
    I guess it's better than her finding the receipt for the storage facility where you keep all the rest of the cigars. LOL!
    They give receipts at the Federal Reserve?
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    honorknight7honorknight7 Posts: 523
    I have no where close to your inventory, but when I decided to go from a day to day/week to week supply 2-10 sticks to deciding I wanted to get into it more and getting my stock up to 50-100ish sticks my wife started to get unhinged, then one day I must have hit the wrong order button >:D and got in a drew estates and a Titania flavor sample pack O-o now she smokes one of her cigars every evening with me while I'm having one of mine now, and weekly asks "honey, when are you going to get me a few new flavors to try?"

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    0patience0patience Posts: 10,665 ✭✭✭✭✭
    honorknight7:
    I have no where close to your inventory, but when I decided to go from a day to day/week to week supply 2-10 sticks to deciding I wanted to get into it more and getting my stock up to 50-100ish sticks my wife started to get unhinged, then one day I must have hit the wrong order button >:D and got in a drew estates and a Titania flavor sample pack O-o now she smokes one of her cigars every evening with me while I'm having one of mine now, and weekly asks "honey, when are you going to get me a few new flavors to try?"

    Get her some CAO moontrance.
    In Fumo Pax
    Money can't buy happiness, but it can buy cigars and that's close enough.

    Wylaff said:
    Atmospheric pressure and crap.
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    honorknight7honorknight7 Posts: 523
    she likes that one OK, (most of the CAO flavors actually), and just LOVES the cherry bomb
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    bearbbearb Posts: 1,128 ✭✭✭
    Mike, those are a few funny stories! One of those that just kept getting better the longer it went. I am sure that all will be fine as you have a great lady there. If you wish, just tell her you are aging them for me cause of all the shipping challenges. ;)
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    MorganGeoMorganGeo Posts: 2,228 ✭✭✭✭✭
    This is too funny. Made my morning. lol
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    PAtoNHPAtoNH Posts: 429
    I can see the headline... "Cigar Hoarder Crushed By Stacks of Coolidors"
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    ShizzsisShizzsis Posts: 263
    LMAO..... I love your wife.... When you least expect it..........bam.... You're out...
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    greg2648greg2648 Posts: 2,440 ✭✭✭
    Kate is a sweet girl...I am sure that she will understand your addiction...If she doesnt, you can store the extra coolers at my crib.....I think that all of us boys should get together and bomb your azzz. Kate would agree, I am sure.
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    macs-smokesmacs-smokes Posts: 587
    Storage costs less than shipping.
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    jd50aejd50ae Posts: 7,900 ✭✭✭✭✭
    I did not know him as well as some, but I know he was a real gentlemen, with occasional and brilliant insights into about all things man and cigars. (But not woman and cigars) He was generous to a fault and never hesitated to share what he had. (Evidently not sharing with his wife) A man we will always remember with fondness (While his wife sells his cigars). So, lets all hoist a cold one (while he dangles from his own petards) ans speak softly of a true BOTL. (While we contact his wife about the cigars)
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    roland_7707roland_7707 Posts: 2,833 ✭✭✭
    jd50ae:
    I did not know him as well as some, but I know he was a real gentlemen, with occasional and brilliant insights into about all things man and cigars. (But not woman and cigars) He was generous to a fault and never hesitated to share what he had. (Evidently not sharing with his wife) A man we will always remember with fondness (While his wife sells his cigars). So, lets all hoist a cold one (while he dangles from his own petards) ans speak softly of a true BOTL. (While we contact his wife about the cigars)
    Sounds like he needs to get rid of some....or smoke faster.
    One God, One Truth
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    Puff_DougiePuff_Dougie Posts: 4,599 ✭✭✭✭✭
    Too funny! Reminded me of this famous poem by Kipling...

    THE BETROTHED

    Open the old cigar-box, get me a Cuba stout,
    For things are running crossways, and Maggie and I are out.

    We quarrelled about Havanas - we fought o'er a good cheroot,
    And I knew she is exacting, and she says I am a brute.

    Open the old cigar-box - let me consider a space;
    In the soft blue veil of the vapour musing on Maggie's face.

    Maggie is pretty to look at - Maggie's a loving lass,
    But the prettiest cheeks must wrinkle, the truest of loves must pass.

    There's peace in a Larranaga, there's calm in a Henry Clay;
    But the best cigar in an hour is finished and thrown away -

    Thrown away for another as perfect and ripe and brown -
    But I could not throw away Maggie for fear o' the talk o' the town!

    Maggie, my wife at fifty - grey and dour and old -
    With never another Maggie to purchase for love or gold!

    And the light of Days that have Been the dark of the Days that Are,
    And Love's torch stinking and stale, like the butt of a dead cigar -

    The butt of a dead cigar you are bound to keep in your pocket -
    With never a new one to light tho' it's charred and black to the socket!

    Open the old cigar-box - let me consider a while.
    Here is a mild Manila - there is a wifely smile.

    Which is the better portion - bondage bought with a ring,
    Or a harem of dusky beauties, fifty tied in a string?

    Counsellors cunning and silent - comforters true and tried,
    And never a one of the fifty to sneer at a rival bride?

    Thought in the early morning, solace in time of woes,
    Peace in the hush of the twilight, balm ere my eyelids close,

    This will the fifty give me, asking nought in return,
    With only a Suttee's passion - to do their duty and burn.

    This will the fifty give me. When they are spent and dead,
    Five times other fifties shall be my servants instead.

    The furrows of far-off Java, the isles of the Spanish Main,
    When they hear my harem is empty will send me my brides again.

    I will take no heed to their raiment, nor food for their mouths withal,
    So long as the gulls are nesting, so long as the showers fall.

    I will scent 'em with best vanilla, with tea will I temper their hides,
    And the Moor and the Mormon shall envy who read of the tale of my brides.

    For Maggie has written a letter to give me my choice between
    The wee little whimpering Love and the great god Nick o' Teen.

    And I have been servant of Love for barely a twelvemonth clear,
    But I have been Priest of Cabanas a matter of seven year;

    And the gloom of my bachelor days is flecked with the cheery light
    Of stumps that I burned to Friendship and Pleasure and Work and Fight.

    And I turn my eyes to the future that Maggie and I must prove,
    But the only light on the marshes is the Will-o'-the-Wisp of Love.

    Will it see me safe through my journey or leave me bogged in the mire?
    Since a puff of tobacco can cloud it, shall I follow the fitful fire?

    Open the old cigar-box - let me consider anew -
    Old friends, and who is Maggie that I should abandon you?

    A million surplus Maggies are willing to bear the yoke;
    And a woman is only a woman, but a good Cigar is a Smoke.

    Light me another Cuba - I hold to my first-sworn vows.
    If Maggie will have no rival, I'll have no Maggie for Spouse!

    "When I have found intense pain relieved, a weary brain soothed, and calm, refreshing sleep obtained by a cigar, I have felt grateful to God, and have blessed His name." - Charles Haddon Spurgeon
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    jliujliu Posts: 7,735 ✭✭✭✭
    Mike, buddy. Please note that behind every good woman there is a great man.
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    Jetmech_63Jetmech_63 Posts: 3,451 ✭✭✭
    jliu:
    Mike, buddy. Please note that behind every good woman there is a great man.
    Even if it's not you... :)
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    curtpickcurtpick Posts: 2,757 ✭✭✭
    MVW67:
    OK, so some of you know I am heading outta town, well the states soon. So my wife tells me I should get out the luggage to figure out what we need... Cool right? WRONG To get to them you have to go into a spare bedroom where my cigar collection is kept, well couple months ago I had to add a container/cooler in the bedroom no thanks to YOU GUYS!!. Which is fine right? Wrong because for some unknown reason my wife came in and wants to talk.....and as she was sitting on one cooler, she looks over and sees the new one.....I'm focked at this point, as she starts in as she is looking at the rest of the containers/humis in the room. I don't remember how long that lecture was.....but long!!

    FFWD. To the other day, she is getting anxious for the luggage, I tell her I will get it out in am... I go to bed, but evidently she DIDN'T I wake the next morning go down stairs and ALL the luggage is out....from under the stairs in the main room.........my stomach is instantly tied in knots and I feel sick....WHY??

    Because under the stairs is another FULL COOLER! I store unopened boxes in!! Now I know there is no way she could've got the luggage with out moving that out of the way.... of course I run in there and check and sure enough it's under the stairs still. I haven't even open to check it because, I'm thinking she might have put a friendly note in it....NOT!!!! The thing is she hasn't said one word about it, I have been sleeping with one eye open just waiting.........:-)
    buhahaha... Mikey is on mamas *** list ! Loving it ! Lol
    Family, Friends, Golf, Cigars, Fine Whiskey, Good beer.... is there anything else ?  Follow on instagram @crguy1961
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    J.S.J.S. Posts: 754
    Well my day looks better! Thanks. Hope all works out for you.
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    jliujliu Posts: 7,735 ✭✭✭✭
    Jetmech_63:
    jliu:
    Mike, buddy. Please note that behind every good woman there is a great man.
    Even if it's not you... :)
    ohhh sting!
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    catfishbluezzcatfishbluezz Posts: 7,000 ✭✭✭
    Buy jewelry....now
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    Jetmech_63Jetmech_63 Posts: 3,451 ✭✭✭
    catfishbluezz:
    Buy jewelry....now

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    LiquidChaos66LiquidChaos66 Posts: 3,767 ✭✭✭✭
    Someone needs some new sparkles on her fingers...
    Life is like a blind fiver. You never know what you're gonna get.
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