Common Sense

Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape. He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as:
- Knowing when to come in out of the rain;
- Why the early bird gets the worm;
- Life isn't always fair;
- and maybe it was my fault.

Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in charge). His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.

Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children. It declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer sun lotion or an aspirin to a student; but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion. Common Sense lost the will to live as the churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their victims. Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault.

Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.

Common Sense was preceded in death, by his parents, Truth and Trust, by his wife, Discretion, by his daughter, Responsibility, and by his son, Reason.

He is survived by his 4 stepbrothers; I Know My Rights, I Want It Now, Someone Else Is To Blame, and I'm A Victim Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone.

Comments

  • HaysHays Costa del Sol, SpainPosts: 2,338 ✭✭✭
    Oldy but a goody...and oh so true.
    ¨The cure for anything is salt water: sweat, tears, or the sea¨ - Isak Dinesen

    ¨Only two people walk around in this world beardless - boys and women - and I am neither one.¨
  • kuzi16kuzi16 Posts: 14,616 ✭✭✭✭
  • HaysHays Costa del Sol, SpainPosts: 2,338 ✭✭✭
    kuzi16:
    image
    Oh man...that busted me up laughing like crazy..
    ¨The cure for anything is salt water: sweat, tears, or the sea¨ - Isak Dinesen

    ¨Only two people walk around in this world beardless - boys and women - and I am neither one.¨
  • gmill880gmill880 Posts: 5,947
    kuzi16:
    image

    Now thats one of the funniest things I have ever seen on here ...LMAO ...I NEED THAT POSTER FOR WORK !!!
  • hahahahaha. That's gold. Good post too.
  • jsnakejsnake Kansas CityPosts: 5,796 ✭✭✭✭✭
    Nice poster!!
  • GoldyGoldy Posts: 1,638 ✭✭
    I think the media has a lot to do with the death of common sense. For example, that coffee incident was an actual incident but the media spun it as someone who was able to sue for spilling coffee. What actually happened, and why she was awarded so much money was that McD's (or who ever it was) changed the coffee cups that they sold coffee in from paper to styrofoam. The company knew what temp to make the coffee at so the consumer would have a hot cup of coffee when they got it. The new cups held onto the heat longer and the company did not change their serving temperature so scaulding coffee was being served to customers. The elderly woman spilled some on her legs due to a faulty lid (I think that correct) and needed skin graphs. She asked the company to cover the cost of the procedure but the comany denied her. After a while she was convinced to take them to court and asked for enough to cover the cost of the procedure. The JURY felt so bad for her that they awarded here a sum in the millions. (I may have forgotten some of the details but thats the jist of it)

    The media spun it so much that now the only thing anyone remembers is that someone spilled some coffee and got paid for it.
  • gmill880gmill880 Posts: 5,947
    Goldy:
    I think the media has a lot to do with the death of common sense. For example, that coffee incident was an actual incident but the media spun it as someone who was able to sue for spilling coffee. What actually happened, and why she was awarded so much money was that McD's (or who ever it was) changed the coffee cups that they sold coffee in from paper to styrofoam. The company knew what temp to make the coffee at so the consumer would have a hot cup of coffee when they got it. The new cups held onto the heat longer and the company did not change their serving temperature so scaulding coffee was being served to customers. The elderly woman spilled some on her legs due to a faulty lid (I think that correct) and needed skin graphs. She asked the company to cover the cost of the procedure but the comany denied her. After a while she was convinced to take them to court and asked for enough to cover the cost of the procedure. The JURY felt so bad for her that they awarded here a sum in the millions. (I may have forgotten some of the details but thats the jist of it)

    The media spun it so much that now the only thing anyone remembers is that someone spilled some coffee and got paid for it.

    Very insightful and interesting ...and as with so much in todays headlines its interesting to actually compare the known facts to the myths ...
  • laker1963laker1963 Posts: 5,046
    gmill880:
    Goldy:
    I think the media has a lot to do with the death of common sense. For example, that coffee incident was an actual incident but the media spun it as someone who was able to sue for spilling coffee. What actually happened, and why she was awarded so much money was that McD's (or who ever it was) changed the coffee cups that they sold coffee in from paper to styrofoam. The company knew what temp to make the coffee at so the consumer would have a hot cup of coffee when they got it. The new cups held onto the heat longer and the company did not change their serving temperature so scaulding coffee was being served to customers. The elderly woman spilled some on her legs due to a faulty lid (I think that correct) and needed skin graphs. She asked the company to cover the cost of the procedure but the comany denied her. After a while she was convinced to take them to court and asked for enough to cover the cost of the procedure. The JURY felt so bad for her that they awarded here a sum in the millions. (I may have forgotten some of the details but thats the jist of it)

    The media spun it so much that now the only thing anyone remembers is that someone spilled some coffee and got paid for it.

    Very insightful and interesting ...and as with so much in todays headlines its interesting to actually compare the known facts to the myths ...

    While it's true the media spin on almost anything newsworthy makes decerning the facts from the "****" an impossibility most times, the thing with the McD's coffee scenario is still too rediculous to be funny. I mean who orders a coffee and doesn't think it will be HOT.
    I'm waiting for the one who orders an iced drink and sues because they froze their tongue and bit it causing bodily damage... all because the ice was TOO FROZEN ! (shaking head)
  • GoldyGoldy Posts: 1,638 ✭✭
    laker1963:
    gmill880:
    Goldy:
    I think the media has a lot to do with the death of common sense. For example, that coffee incident was an actual incident but the media spun it as someone who was able to sue for spilling coffee. What actually happened, and why she was awarded so much money was that McD's (or who ever it was) changed the coffee cups that they sold coffee in from paper to styrofoam. The company knew what temp to make the coffee at so the consumer would have a hot cup of coffee when they got it. The new cups held onto the heat longer and the company did not change their serving temperature so scaulding coffee was being served to customers. The elderly woman spilled some on her legs due to a faulty lid (I think that correct) and needed skin graphs. She asked the company to cover the cost of the procedure but the comany denied her. After a while she was convinced to take them to court and asked for enough to cover the cost of the procedure. The JURY felt so bad for her that they awarded here a sum in the millions. (I may have forgotten some of the details but thats the jist of it)

    The media spun it so much that now the only thing anyone remembers is that someone spilled some coffee and got paid for it.

    Very insightful and interesting ...and as with so much in todays headlines its interesting to actually compare the known facts to the myths ...

    While it's true the media spin on almost anything newsworthy makes decerning the facts from the "****" an impossibility most times, the thing with the McD's coffee scenario is still too rediculous to be funny. I mean who orders a coffee and doesn't think it will be HOT.
    I'm waiting for the one who orders an iced drink and sues because they froze their tongue and bit it causing bodily damage... all because the ice was TOO FROZEN ! (shaking head)


    I agree, coffee should be hot and you should expect it. Its almost unbelievable to me that you can get sued for selling coffee that is too hot.
  • stephen_hannibalstephen_hannibal Posts: 4,317
    I love this post... I've said this so much recently. What is the world coming to... a common question asked by the classics.
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