Joke - The Italian Bride

Smoke=FireSmoke=Fire Posts: 692 ✭✭
A young Italian girl of good standing, and pure of both heart and body, is wed one day after her 16th birthday. The ceremony is lovely, the families overjoyed to see the young couple off on their honeymoon. Unfortunately, they cannot leave until the next morning, and so spend the first night at the home of the brides’ mother.

The guests leave, the night deepens, and the groom turns to his new wife with a smile and suggests that they should retire for the evening. With a hesitant smile to her mother who sits in a chair downstairs, the bride nods her head and quietly follows her husband up to their bedroom. As she stands nervously near the bed, unsure of what is to come, the groom removes his shirt…to reveal a chest and back covered in thick coarse hair.

Having never seen a man unclothed before, the bride is horrified by the sight, and runs downstairs to her mother.

“Mama, mama…I no canna do this; he has a hairy back and a hairy chest!”.

Her mother replies “You be a good Italian girl, you go upstairs and a make a love to your husband”.

The bride walks back to the bedroom, where the groom is waiting. Smiling, he takes off his shoes and pulls his pants down…to reveal that his legs are also covered in the same thick black fur. She turns and bolts back downstairs.

“Mama, mama…I no canna do this; he has a hairy legs!”

Her mother replies “You be a good Italian girl, you go upstairs and a make a love to your husband”.

The bride walks back once more to the bedroom, where the groom is waiting. He is still smiling, and sits down on the bed, pulling off first one sock, than the other…to reveal that half of his foot is missing from an accident. The girl screams and runs back downstairs.

“Mama, mama…I no canna do this; he has a foot and a half!”.

Her mother stands up, places her hands upon her shoulders, and gently pushes her down into the chair, saying “You better sit down, this looks like a job for you momma”

Comments

  • urbinourbino Posts: 4,517
    Dr. Pepper just came out my nose. And I haven't had a Dr. Pepper in years.
  • rmccloudrmccloud Posts: 160 ✭✭
    Smoke, you have some great jokes!!!!!
  • j0z3rj0z3r Posts: 9,403
    Nicely done Smoke, that was hilarious.
  • rdnstnrdnstn Posts: 993 ✭✭
    Very good joke Smoke. I'm lucky I swallowed my drink before I read that.
  • la-henryla-henry Posts: 74
    Wow..........that's all i can say to that one. **** wow.
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