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Anyone heard of the 24hr of LeMons

denniskingdennisking Posts: 3,703 ✭✭✭
It's been a while since I've posted in here. I used to post here a ton but as time has gone on, I've been less and less present due to kids, life, other hobbies, etc. I thought I would post a little blurb I wrote about a recent race I was involved in. If you are my Facebook friend, I have shared this post there as well.


Thanksgiving weekend 2013, my brother hatches a hair-brained scheme. Let's do a LeMons racecar. He's a determined guy. He has a 911 C4S for track day duty and works in the medical field, as does his wife. They've got no children, and oodles of time and money to work with. I'm a family man, have a very blessed life, but not the kind of disposable racing income that it takes to campaign any type of regular vehicle in any series. I don't have the time either.

That's what makes LeMons so appealing. $500 car. A handful of races. A less than serious atmosphere.

I'm game. Let's do this.

Fast forward a few weeks, Brian (my brother) has located a Volvo 242 Turbo that a father and son were working on as a project. They've got it on Criagslist. My brother writes a $500 check and pays some under the table funds in cash on top of that for the car, as you are already probably aware, LeMons puts a "$500" value on the car. More on that later.

Volvo turbo, you ask. I know, to some of the lay-people on here, they will be wondering why I didn't get a Miata or E36 or other TCL Darling. Well, no other car has logged more laps in LeMons events than the Volvo 240. It's also a turbo car that makes 300hp extremely easily and cheaply without looking non-stock and thus, drawing attention to our cheating modifications. You see, LeMons is not about sticking to the rules. Like most racing, it's about how many rules you can break or bend without getting caught. You'll see more of this later.

The week after Christmas, I start tearing in to the car. I need to remove most of the interior as we've secured sponsorship from John's Custom Fabrication in Coos Bay, OR for a full cage, thanks to a great relationship my dad has with the owner. Here in the Portland/Salem area, there are quite a few Volvo enthusiasts. Since I know a few folks in this crowd, I text one. He removes the dash at no cost and in return, I give it to him as it is a nice example.

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Off to the fab shop for the cage

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Once we finally get the car back, it's time for some wiring relocation and other small incidentals. We still had tires, suspension, safety items like ball joints to remedy. We also needed a new timing belt and to fix some oil leaks.

On the journey to my house after sorting those items, the car decides to break down. It seemed to have spark, fuel, etc, so we were at a loss. Off to the Volvo geniuses at R-Sport International in Portland where Asher, a friend and enthusiast works. He decides to ditch the K-Jetronic injection, install a new engine harness with Motronic control, 850 injectors, and a 740 intake manifold. This is a pretty sweet little cheater setup since it allows for much better air flow, better fuel control, and eventually more boost.

Back to getting the suspension sorted (cutting springs) and installing the tires. Cutting springs you say. Yeah, because suspension (the real kind) costs money and money is penalty laps in LeMons. Also, this is a $500 car so we are trying to not lose focus of that. It's also a little known fact that if you cut 2.5 coils on the stock suspension, it will not bounce and increase the spring rate to what we are looking for.

Problem though, it runs like crap. Stinks of fuel. It's running super rich. I pick it up from the tire shop and tow it over to R-Sport

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While sorting the problem at R-Sport, we find the manifold is missing a block off plate underneath. Problem solved. As we are getting ready to fire off the car, a Vanagon towing a Mini pulls up and a guy walks over, introduces himself as Crazy Mike, and asks if we are Lemonites. I reply yes. He proceeds to chat and chat and chat. His personality is great but right now, we need to make sure this black bucket of bolts actually runs.

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Sure enough. It runs. Like a beast. Tons of power. Boosts like a champ. We're ready to win.

Not.

Fast forward to the start of the race.

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Colby takes the first stint. He's off and running. Car seems to be running a little rich still but it should be ok. He pits after a few laps and we swap drivers.

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Chris takes the next session. Chris owns Two Kilts Brewing and is a major sponsor in making this all happen.

Chris' first lap is great. He gives the thumbs up on the straight after lap one. A few more laps and it looks as if we are gonna do well. Then we don't see Chris.

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Turns out that water pump pulley failures are really common on the B21FT motor. Huh, ya don't say.

Three hours later, a phone call to Asher, who calls a guy off Turbo Bricks in Bremerton who goes to a pick and pull and delivers us a new water pump pulley and we're off and running again. My stint starts out ok but the car starts to misfire like crazy.

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I don't feel bad though. The Hudson Hornet disguised as Doc Hudson from Cars has been out for a while as is our neighbor in the Corvair.

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We decide to call it a night.

The next morning we send Brian out for the first stint as he hasn't gone yet. 3 laps in with brand new plugs, they are black and she's running bad. There's really nothing we can do at this point. It's Sunday and we are in Shelton Washington, not the Volvo supply Mecca of the PNW.

Then it comes to me. If we're running so rich, why don't I give it more air. I disconnect the vacuum line to the wastegate and plug it with a bolt. Now that I have full boost (which we refer to as Red Boost due to the analog, color only boost gauge in the Volvo from the factory) she runs like a scalded dog.

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I turn the fastest laps the car saw. It was actually pulling cars on the straights and suprisingly very composed under hard cornering. Pretty impressive really. It's using a little oil though and missing when off the throttle so I decide to bring it in to avoid a catastrophic failure.

Brian decides that we HAVE to actually finish so he sets out for the final 15 minutes of the race. The car's running like garbage. I notice a nice little plume of smoke as he passes.

The checkered flag waves and that's it. We've finished with our totally tragic broken Volvo. The smoke from the tailpipe (turns out a wasted turbo passing copious amounts of oil through it) is billowing and can be seen from the entire track. They make us shut the car off after the race, but we finished, which is more than I can say for a whole bunch of cars, including multiple Toyotas, and our neighbor in the Corvair who sawed the rod off cylinder three after he bent it so he could attempt to finish.

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The moral here is cheat. The winners all do it. The Model T GT is a cheatin slutbag. The Jeep Cherokee from Team Petty Cash is stuffed with a Chevy LS motor. The key is to bribe the judges. Alcohol seems to be most effective. They assign a lap penalty for cheating but the reliability and power of the car outweighs that by far. They spray paint the car with a "Bribed" stencil, slap you on the wrist, and send you on your way.

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Model T GT

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Team Petty Cash's Jeep

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Crazy Mike and his California Raisin Mini Cooper

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Silversleeves Racing and their Barbie Vette complete with Cross-Fire injection and real life Barbie in the box

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Team Landcrab with their MG Sedan complete with FWD running gear from a Probe GT V6

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Us in a rare shot where we are actually moving under our own power

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The end result

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Did I mention that Chris owns a brewery

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If you get a chance to do this racing, I highly recommend it.

Comments

  • danielzreyesdanielzreyes Posts: 8,771 ✭✭✭✭✭
    We need #momo #corbeauner
    "It's plume, bro. Nothing to worry about. Got any Opus?" The suppose to be DZR
  • dr_frankenstein56dr_frankenstein56 Posts: 1,612 ✭✭✭
    Baddass man! You should be proud!
  • blutattooblutattoo Posts: 1,294 ✭✭✭
    Lemons is tons of fun. We had a Volvo Bertone that we ran for a few years, even managed to finish a race. I miss it, but damn it was fun. I think I found a video of that MG on Big Muscle.
  • bert873bert873 Posts: 2,561 ✭✭✭✭✭
    That is awesome! I've always wanted to do this
  • denniskingdennisking Posts: 3,703 ✭✭✭
    blutattoo:
    Lemons is tons of fun. We had a Volvo Bertone that we ran for a few years, even managed to finish a race. I miss it, but damn it was fun. I think I found a video of that MG on Big Muscle.
    I've watched that vid. Drive does a good job (or did before they started charging to watch)



    We are building a B23F out of a 740 and slapping a turbo on it for the next time out. Should make 300hp very reliably. The car is super solid so we should actually be competitive next time out with that thing.
  • denniskingdennisking Posts: 3,703 ✭✭✭
    danielzreyes:
    We need #momo #corbeauner
    #corbeauner is what makes the magic happen my friend.
  • blutattooblutattoo Posts: 1,294 ✭✭✭
    dennisking:
    blutattoo:
    Lemons is tons of fun. We had a Volvo Bertone that we ran for a few years, even managed to finish a race. I miss it, but damn it was fun. I think I found a video of that MG on Big Muscle.
    I've watched that vid. Drive does a good job (or did before they started charging to watch)



    We are building a B23F out of a 740 and slapping a turbo on it for the next time out. Should make 300hp very reliably. The car is super solid so we should actually be competitive next time out with that thing.
    You guys will have to come down to Thunderhill for the lemons race one year. They expanded the track to a full five miles. It should be a lot less crowded unless they just increase the number of entries. It's a fun track.
  • denniskingdennisking Posts: 3,703 ✭✭✭
    We actually plan on doing Thunderhill next year. None of us have driven it yet so it should be a blast. A 5 mile road course would actually be a lot of fun. What's a fast LeMons lap time there?
  • blutattooblutattoo Posts: 1,294 ✭✭✭
    dennisking:
    We actually plan on doing Thunderhill next year. None of us have driven it yet so it should be a blast. A 5 mile road course would actually be a lot of fun. What's a fast LeMons lap time there?
    Don't know about the new distance, I haven't run it yet. It just opened in June. Sub 4:00 in a street car seems pretty good. Lemons is in September, so I'll find out in a couple of weeks. On the old 3 mile track sub 2:15 in traffic was a pretty good time, if you had the track to yourself we could usually run sub 2:10 with the bypass.

    You'll have to get my info I'll come help with some pit work if you need it. By that time I hope to have at least a little track knowledge for you. I will say if you need parts, bring em with you cuz the nearest major city is like 45 miles away.
  • denniskingdennisking Posts: 3,703 ✭✭✭
    blutattoo:
    dennisking:
    We actually plan on doing Thunderhill next year. None of us have driven it yet so it should be a blast. A 5 mile road course would actually be a lot of fun. What's a fast LeMons lap time there?
    Don't know about the new distance, I haven't run it yet. It just opened in June. Sub 4:00 in a street car seems pretty good. Lemons is in September, so I'll find out in a couple of weeks. On the old 3 mile track sub 2:15 in traffic was a pretty good time, if you had the track to yourself we could usually run sub 2:10 with the bypass.

    You'll have to get my info I'll come help with some pit work if you need it. By that time I hope to have at least a little track knowledge for you. I will say if you need parts, bring em with you cuz the nearest major city is like 45 miles away.
    That would be so awesome. I will say that when we do a race, we bring a keg of whatever my buddy Chris has fresh at the brewery.

    My grandparents used to live in Colusa and you aren't kidding, that area is desolate.
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