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Confused

genareddoggenareddog Posts: 4,233 ✭✭✭✭✭
in Non Cigar Related
So my oldest daughter officially moved out of the house today. My first reaction was this is so great and we have only one more to go. When we got married we had a goal in mind to have kids early and have them out of the house by the time we were 50 . Looks like that will happen. 
 I am confused because she moved in with her boyfriend. He is a good guy and think they will get engaged but their not married yet and living with each other. Most of you will probably say that's just how it is now a days but I still don't like it. 

Comments

  • WylaffWylaff Posts: 5,369 ✭✭✭✭✭
    I am inclined to agree with you.
    "Cooking isn't about struggling; It's about pleasure. It's like sǝx, with a wider variety of sauces."

    At any given time the urge to sing "In The Jungle" is just a whim away... A whim away... A whim away...
  • silvermousesilvermouse Posts: 21,092 ✭✭✭✭✭
    OTOH, if it is a bad choice it may be better to make it now rather than after getting married and starting a family.
  • 0patience0patience Posts: 10,665 ✭✭✭✭✭
    Look at it from another view.
    In this day and age, in order for anyone to get out on their own, they have to live with someone. It's extremely difficult for anyone starting out to make it on their own.

    And remember one thing about family. You don't have to like what they do, but they are family, so you have to accept their decisions. Right or wrong.

    Not a help, I know. 
    In Fumo Pax
    Money can't buy happiness, but it can buy cigars and that's close enough.

    Wylaff said:
    Atmospheric pressure and crap.
  • 90+_Irishman90+_Irishman Posts: 12,409 ✭✭✭✭✭
    At the end of the day it really only had to work out between you two on it, hope that some other ideas and opinions can help clarify but yours is the one that matters most here ;)

    Brett
    "When walking in open territory bother no one. If someone bothers you, ask them to stop. If they do not stop, destroy them."
  • genareddoggenareddog Posts: 4,233 ✭✭✭✭✭
    They both know how my wife and I feel and it's not like we are upset with them and they know that. Just wished their beliefs were like ours. They are adults now so they can do what they want. She is very happy and that makes us happy. 
  • dirtdudedirtdude Posts: 5,862 ✭✭✭✭✭
    I will defer to the experts  as my kids are a freaking wreck
    A little dirt never hurt
  • EchambersEchambers Posts: 4,184 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited June 2016
    I have no problem with this--the original implication if the idea of living in sin was that fact that they were having sex before marriage. that was the first "proof" they were sexually active.  Now, while you don't want to thing about it, your daughter has likely been securely active for some time.  

    regardless, I feel for you man.  my daughter just turned 18... 
    -- "There's something that doesn't make sense. Let's go poke it with a stick."
  • AlbinfkAlbinfk Posts: 1,923 ✭✭✭✭✭
    I have twin 23 year old daughters and know how you feel. The fact that they are both happy should make you feel good. Sounds like your daughter was brought up by two very special parents and that will go along way with her. Just be cool, let it go, and see what happens. You've done your job.  
  • peter4jcpeter4jc Posts: 16,679 ✭✭✭✭✭
    If I was in your shoes, Larry, I'd feel the same.  Just keep lovin' on them, and I'll bet there'll come a day when you're giving her away at the altar.
    "I could've had a Mi Querida!"   Nick Bardis
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 3,917 ✭
    You and I are in the same boat but I only had 1 to worry about. 

    As as long as he treats her right and she's happy and safe, that's all that matters to me. I understand you might be coming from a spiritual point of view though. 

    Do do you like IPA?
  • MartelMartel Posts: 3,306 ✭✭✭✭
    I've recently officiated weddings for two couples that cohabited before marriage, and I think both have strong chances of succeeding.  Statistics I've seen show that living together doesn't predict the success of a relationship for the long-term, whether married or not, better than other factors.  The "see if we can get along" reasoning is a myth that sounds logical to people but isn't data driven.

    Maturity and emotional well-adjustment are two of the best indicators of relationship success, go figure.  They are in the mix with financial compatibility and security as tops.  Religious commitment can be powerful, but can also be abused to keep people in unsafe/manipulative relationships as much as it can get people through simple rough patches of life.

    In the end, you raised 'em right, yeah?  This might be a mistake, but hopefully they've learned to learn from those, because they'll make more.  And you're that much closer to having both out!  My youngest just finished 6th grade and I'm 39.  That empty nest-ish stage might start at 45 for me!
    Intelligence is knowing that a tomato is a fruit; wisdom is knowing not to put it in a fruit salad.

    I like Oliva and Quesada (including Regius) a lot.  I will smoke anything, though.
  • genareddoggenareddog Posts: 4,233 ✭✭✭✭✭
    james40 said:
    You and I are in the same boat but I only had 1 to worry about. 

    As as long as he treats her right and she's happy and safe, that's all that matters to me. I understand you might be coming from a spiritual point of view though. 

    Do do you like IPA?

    Thanks James but I don't drink or smoke any longer.
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