February Lottery
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When it comes to altruism, humans are the giraffes of the animal world.
Especially here in America, where we have more to give. Not so long ago, the largest organization in America was the Odd Fellows. Ordinary folks banding together to help others when life isn't fair. And the OF's was just one of many lodges that thrived in every hamlet all over the land. From Knights of Pythias to Knights of Peter Claver; from Moose to Elks to Owls. Of course, big government has fairly usurped all those functions, now. Tho church soup kitchens and charity drives still thrive. You can't hardly find a church (other'n maybe scientology and satanists, I dunno) which doesn't collect coats & canned food, cook for the homeless, go on missions, or etc. And even if you were a satanist, if you fell on hard times, I bet you'd turn to your fellow satan worshipper first. Some fellers maintain that before government welfare, the old and the poor were most often "kicked to the curb". Horse pebbles. That view ignores basic human nature. How basic? I remember reading one time about a grave dig in a peat bog in Florida. Peat preserves corpses about forever, see. These dead primitives dated back eight thousand years ago. Other'n being dyed black and shrivelled, there they were, just as they were buried. The diggers found one fellow with severe spina bifida. Shrivelled from the waist down. They calculated he was thirty some years old when he finally died. Can you imagine a band of hunter gatherers taking turns with a tump line toting this full grown cripple in their wanderings thru the swamps and thickets for three decades? Holy Moly. How many times them scrabbling skeeter swatters have to fight the wolves off Urk? Urk ain't heavy, he's my tribal brother. Hold him out quick, cause Urk's gotta poop again. Poor kid can't hold it in. Golden hearts. Golden hearts. We were born generous the same way we were born thumbed. I am convinced most all of us, when we dream of winning the lottery, first thing we think about doing is not the gold digging Marla or Melania (well okay Elin is pretty damn awesome, I gotta admit I'd stop whatever I was doing to do her) who would soon chase after us in droves, but, instead, we right away think about the people we know who we could help out if only we could get lucky and win two hundred mil in the lottery and keep one hunnerd mil after the taxman. I think of Carnegie, Buffet, Gates.... and Davis.
Ordinary Joes who work their tails off to win the sports lottery are no different. First contract, Momma gets a house. First free agent contract, a foundation is endowed. Each year the NFL awards the most generous of these cats. The award? More money for their foundations. Fitting. This year, the three finalists are Eli Manning, Larry Fitzgerald, Greg Olsen (Panthers tight end). Kewl. Winner will be announced the day before the Super Bowl.
So. Here comes the February Lottery and side bet. If you want in, post "IN". If you also want a tenner from me, tell me who will win the NFL man of the year. Since we are down to three finalists at this point, we need a tie breaker. So give me the Super Bowl winner. Since the Pats are in the Super Bowl, we still need a tie breaker. So give me the score. You will get five home rolls and five premiums from me.
summary:
IN scores the lottery.
NFL man of the year, SB winner, score wins the tenner.
Here we go.
Especially here in America, where we have more to give. Not so long ago, the largest organization in America was the Odd Fellows. Ordinary folks banding together to help others when life isn't fair. And the OF's was just one of many lodges that thrived in every hamlet all over the land. From Knights of Pythias to Knights of Peter Claver; from Moose to Elks to Owls. Of course, big government has fairly usurped all those functions, now. Tho church soup kitchens and charity drives still thrive. You can't hardly find a church (other'n maybe scientology and satanists, I dunno) which doesn't collect coats & canned food, cook for the homeless, go on missions, or etc. And even if you were a satanist, if you fell on hard times, I bet you'd turn to your fellow satan worshipper first. Some fellers maintain that before government welfare, the old and the poor were most often "kicked to the curb". Horse pebbles. That view ignores basic human nature. How basic? I remember reading one time about a grave dig in a peat bog in Florida. Peat preserves corpses about forever, see. These dead primitives dated back eight thousand years ago. Other'n being dyed black and shrivelled, there they were, just as they were buried. The diggers found one fellow with severe spina bifida. Shrivelled from the waist down. They calculated he was thirty some years old when he finally died. Can you imagine a band of hunter gatherers taking turns with a tump line toting this full grown cripple in their wanderings thru the swamps and thickets for three decades? Holy Moly. How many times them scrabbling skeeter swatters have to fight the wolves off Urk? Urk ain't heavy, he's my tribal brother. Hold him out quick, cause Urk's gotta poop again. Poor kid can't hold it in. Golden hearts. Golden hearts. We were born generous the same way we were born thumbed. I am convinced most all of us, when we dream of winning the lottery, first thing we think about doing is not the gold digging Marla or Melania (well okay Elin is pretty damn awesome, I gotta admit I'd stop whatever I was doing to do her) who would soon chase after us in droves, but, instead, we right away think about the people we know who we could help out if only we could get lucky and win two hundred mil in the lottery and keep one hunnerd mil after the taxman. I think of Carnegie, Buffet, Gates.... and Davis.
Ordinary Joes who work their tails off to win the sports lottery are no different. First contract, Momma gets a house. First free agent contract, a foundation is endowed. Each year the NFL awards the most generous of these cats. The award? More money for their foundations. Fitting. This year, the three finalists are Eli Manning, Larry Fitzgerald, Greg Olsen (Panthers tight end). Kewl. Winner will be announced the day before the Super Bowl.
So. Here comes the February Lottery and side bet. If you want in, post "IN". If you also want a tenner from me, tell me who will win the NFL man of the year. Since we are down to three finalists at this point, we need a tie breaker. So give me the Super Bowl winner. Since the Pats are in the Super Bowl, we still need a tie breaker. So give me the score. You will get five home rolls and five premiums from me.
summary:
IN scores the lottery.
NFL man of the year, SB winner, score wins the tenner.
Here we go.
“It has been a source of great pain to me to have met with so many among [my] opponents who had not the liberality to distinguish between political and social opposition; who transferred at once to the person, the hatred they bore to his political opinions.” —Thomas Jefferson (1808)
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Comments
"I've got a great cigar collection - it's actually not a collection, because that would imply I wasn't going to smoke ever last one of 'em." - Ron White
At any given time the urge to sing "In The Jungle" is just a whim away... A whim away... A whim away...
“I come in peace. I didn’t bring artillery. But I’m pleading with you, with tears in my eyes: If you f@$# with me, I’ll kill you all.” -Gen. James Mattis, USMC
olsen, Patriots 23-17
in / man of the year / super bowl winner / score
It's almost like people forgot where they were and read the directions
Fitz, Falcons, 42-35
Keep up the good work Davis
Roland
So the odds are one in nine. Here goes:
Addy up Waternerd!
Results of the tenner side bet, of course, awaits the weekend.
Thanks again everyone
"I've got a great cigar collection - it's actually not a collection, because that would imply I wasn't going to smoke ever last one of 'em." - Ron White
Shoot me an addy for @Wylaff. I'll mail it tomorrow. Ran out of priority boxes packing samples over the weekend, so I scored a sheaf of them today. If you or someone can get me nachos, I'll have this packed up tonight. I just cracked open a new stash of home rolls aged since July, ought to be primo.
What a game! At least two catches will be perennial ESPN re-runs. How does Edelman do that between the other fellow's legs? That game is going in the vault at NFL films. All it lacks now is John Facenda.
9505512454967037017525
“I come in peace. I didn’t bring artillery. But I’m pleading with you, with tears in my eyes: If you f@$# with me, I’ll kill you all.” -Gen. James Mattis, USMC
Wayne @wylaff is the first to strike with a great sampler
Wayne, duck.
At any given time the urge to sing "In The Jungle" is just a whim away... A whim away... A whim away...
@Wylaff, you got # 9505514352927039035870 coming your way
Enjoy.