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When your family does those things..

0patience0patience Posts: 10,665 ✭✭✭✭✭
edited August 2021 in Non Cigar Related

A battle over bathrooms today, my son's girlfriend, who the live in our house, went on a tangent about the toilet seat.
Her: People need to put the damn seat down.
Me: No, you need to learn to look and put it down yourself.
Her: I'm getting tired of falling in.
Me: Well now, I'm gonna leave it up, just to hear the splash and laugh my a$$ off.

In Fumo Pax
Money can't buy happiness, but it can buy cigars and that's close enough.

Wylaff said:
Atmospheric pressure and crap.
«1

Comments

  • 0patience0patience Posts: 10,665 ✭✭✭✭✭

    @Yakster said:
    I have the solution to the toilet seat argument. I'll put the seat down if they'll put it up. I can't be the only one moving the seat around.

    Eggzactly!

    In Fumo Pax
    Money can't buy happiness, but it can buy cigars and that's close enough.

    Wylaff said:
    Atmospheric pressure and crap.
  • jlmartajlmarta Posts: 7,881 ✭✭✭✭✭

    It seems to me that the logical answer to this question is for EVERYONE to put the seat and the lid down down. This way, the monkey’s on everyone’s back and the bathroom has a more genteel look.

    I’ve found from experience, though, that the females are the first and loudest to complain about this approach….. Go figure… 🙄

  • Amos_UmwhatAmos_Umwhat Posts: 8,898 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited August 2021

    @jlmarta said:
    It seems to me that the logical answer to this question is for EVERYONE to put the seat and the lid down down. This way, the monkey’s on everyone’s back and the bathroom has a more genteel look.

    I’ve found from experience, though, that the females are the first and loudest to complain about this approach….. Go figure… 🙄

    This is exactly the solution I implemented in my household many many years ago, and yes, they still complain. I tried explaining prior to this solution that

    1) it's incomprehensible to men that one wouldn't first LOOK to see where one was going,

    and

    2) if we were to take their approach, leave the seat down and not look, we'd be peeing on the seat and we don't like to do that because sometimes we have to sit there. (strangely, those who fall in because they don't look always notice the pee on the seat)

    Those logical approaches gained no ground. So, seat down, lid down, nothing ever accidently falls into the toilet. This approach is both cleaner and safer, and places the burden equally on all users.

    But, they still won't be happy. There's a reason for that which we gentlemen will never fully understand. I certainly don't.

    WARNING:  The above post may contain thoughts or ideas known to the State of Caliphornia to cause seething rage, confusion, distemper, nausea, perspiration, sphincter release, or cranial implosion to persons who implicitly trust only one news source, or find themselves at either the left or right political extreme.  Proceed at your own risk.  

    "If you do not read the newspapers you're uninformed.  If you do read the newspapers, you're misinformed." --  Mark Twain
  • webmostwebmost Posts: 7,713 ✭✭✭✭✭

    @Amos_Umwhat said:

    But, they still won't be happy. There's a reason for that which we gentlemen will never fully understand. I certainly don't.

    You need me to mansplain it to you?

    “It has been a source of great pain to me to have met with so many among [my] opponents who had not the liberality to distinguish between political and social opposition; who transferred at once to the person, the hatred they bore to his political opinions.” —Thomas Jefferson (1808)


  • skydiverDskydiverD Posts: 2,713 ✭✭✭✭✭

    I long ago capitulated to the complete lack of common sense on this one. It's a no win proposition. So now I just close seat and the lid every time. We buy the soft close seats, so all I have to do is flick it downward and walk away.

    How do you like my profile pic Taborski?   @matkn293          
  • Bob_LukenBob_Luken Posts: 10,833 ✭✭✭✭✭

    My plan is no plan. But if I had a plan,... I like Steve's and Darren's plan.
    Close the seat to solve her problem. Close the lid for spite. I like that.

  • Bob_LukenBob_Luken Posts: 10,833 ✭✭✭✭✭
  • Bob_LukenBob_Luken Posts: 10,833 ✭✭✭✭✭
  • Bob_LukenBob_Luken Posts: 10,833 ✭✭✭✭✭
  • Bob_LukenBob_Luken Posts: 10,833 ✭✭✭✭✭
  • Bob_LukenBob_Luken Posts: 10,833 ✭✭✭✭✭

    What if all women demanded to NEVER open a door for themselves? So much so that they crashed into doors all the time because they wouldn't even bother to look at a door to check,... because they expect it to be opened, by a man, always.

    It's the same damned logic with the toilet seats.

  • jlmartajlmarta Posts: 7,881 ✭✭✭✭✭

    @webmost said:

    @Amos_Umwhat said:

    But, they still won't be happy. There's a reason for that which we gentlemen will never fully understand. I certainly don't.

    You need me to mansplain it to you?

    I believe the reason being mentioned here is called “feminine logic”…. We men encounter it frequently…. 👴🏻👍

  • VegasFrankVegasFrank Posts: 18,344 ✭✭✭✭✭

    I have to say that the big yellow square tile in front of the toilet is disturbing.

    Disclaimer:  All trolling is provided for the sole entertainment purposes of the author only. Readers may find entertainment and hard core truths, but none are intended. Any resulting damaged feelings or arse chapping of the reader are the sole responsibility of the reader, to include, but not limited to: crying, anger, revenge pørn, and abandonment or deletion of ccom accounts. Offer void in Utah because Utah is terrible.
  • VegasFrankVegasFrank Posts: 18,344 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited August 2021

    Never trust anyone who has an ace up his sleeve arm tattoo. Also never trust anyone who's going to hot glue onto a wet surface. Also never trust anyone who's going to duct tape a toilet seat. Finally, never trust anyone who has bugs running around on his f****** toilet in the video.

    I would say two thumbs down, but this guy probably Lost one of his thumbs to a bookie...

    Disclaimer:  All trolling is provided for the sole entertainment purposes of the author only. Readers may find entertainment and hard core truths, but none are intended. Any resulting damaged feelings or arse chapping of the reader are the sole responsibility of the reader, to include, but not limited to: crying, anger, revenge pørn, and abandonment or deletion of ccom accounts. Offer void in Utah because Utah is terrible.
  • Bob_LukenBob_Luken Posts: 10,833 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited August 2021

    @VegasFrank said:

    Never trust anyone who has an ace up his sleeve arm tattoo. Also never trust anyone who's going to hot glue onto a wet surface. Also never trust anyone who's going to duct tape a toilet seat. Finally, never trust anyone who has bugs running around on his f****** toilet in the video.

    I would say two thumbs down, but this guy probably Lost one of his thumbs to a bookie...

    And,...Did you notice you could see daylight straight through one nostril and out the other?

    But,... besides all that, he proved the concept works. Add a few improvements, (Stainless steel screws and a plastic strap to replace the dumb sh** he used,) and you might have a cheap, workable solution to a non-problem. (Just make sure your screws aren't too long, or maybe just a tad too long for the fun of it.)

  • VegasFrankVegasFrank Posts: 18,344 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited August 2021

    @Bob_Luken said:

    @VegasFrank said:

    Never trust anyone who has an ace up his sleeve arm tattoo. Also never trust anyone who's going to hot glue onto a wet surface. Also never trust anyone who's going to duct tape a toilet seat. Finally, never trust anyone who has bugs running around on his f****** toilet in the video.

    I would say two thumbs down, but this guy probably Lost one of his thumbs to a bookie...

    And,...Did you notice you could see daylight straight through one nostril and out the other?

    But,... besides all that, he proved the concept works. Add a few improvements, (Stainless steel screws and a plastic strap to replace the dumb sh** he used,) and you might have a cheap, workable solution to a non-problem. (Just make sure your screws aren't too long, or maybe just a tad too long for the fun of it.)

    Yeah, I wasn't sure what it was. I thought maybe it was a bat in the cave lol, but another piece of the puzzle falls into place for sure.

    Disclaimer:  All trolling is provided for the sole entertainment purposes of the author only. Readers may find entertainment and hard core truths, but none are intended. Any resulting damaged feelings or arse chapping of the reader are the sole responsibility of the reader, to include, but not limited to: crying, anger, revenge pørn, and abandonment or deletion of ccom accounts. Offer void in Utah because Utah is terrible.
  • VegasFrankVegasFrank Posts: 18,344 ✭✭✭✭✭

    For my part in the debate, I'm trying to win the war not the battle. She can have her toilet seat down. I don't care. I bought one of those slow close seats, so you flip it down and some internal mechanism gently lowers it.

    Disclaimer:  All trolling is provided for the sole entertainment purposes of the author only. Readers may find entertainment and hard core truths, but none are intended. Any resulting damaged feelings or arse chapping of the reader are the sole responsibility of the reader, to include, but not limited to: crying, anger, revenge pørn, and abandonment or deletion of ccom accounts. Offer void in Utah because Utah is terrible.
  • peter4jcpeter4jc Posts: 16,679 ✭✭✭✭✭

    That last video w/ the ribbon and glue is fake as ****.

    "I could've had a Mi Querida!"   Nick Bardis
  • JrflicksterJrflickster Posts: 4,182 ✭✭✭✭✭

    @Yakster said:
    I have the solution to the toilet seat argument. I'll put the seat down if they'll put it up. I can't be the only one moving the seat around.

    Love it

  • Bob_LukenBob_Luken Posts: 10,833 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited August 2021

    @VegasFrank said:
    I bought one of those slow close seats, so you flip it down and some internal mechanism gently lowers it.

    Those slow closers seats and lids are GREAT! Everybody needs those. Never again having the lid slam in the night is well worth it to buy and install, plus if you're compelled to keep the ladies happy, it's that much easier to do.

    But I say if any gal is a stickler for having it down, close the lid too, for spite, and/or to remind her that you love her.

    Her: "Babe, I appreciate the seat being down, but why do you always put the lid down too? That means I have to lift the lid every time."

    Him: Well, so,.... I have to lift the seat every time I pee."

    Her: That's necessary. Me having to lift the lid is not necessary."

    Him: "Well, putting the seat down for you is unnecessary, but it's a courtesy I provide to you. And closing the lid is to remind you of each and every time I do that for you."

    Her: "I don't need a reminder every time."

    Him: "OK sweetie, no more reminders except this one, check the damn seat before you sit."

  • Bob_LukenBob_Luken Posts: 10,833 ✭✭✭✭✭

    @peter4jc said:
    That last video w/ the ribbon and glue is fake as ****.

    you try it already?

  • peter4jcpeter4jc Posts: 16,679 ✭✭✭✭✭

    @Bob_Luken said:

    @peter4jc said:
    That last video w/ the ribbon and glue is fake as ****.

    you try it already?

    Nope. I just don't believe the weight of that 'floater' as he called it (to me, the term 'floater' when used in relation to a terlet is something different :p ) wouldn't be sufficient to overcome the friction of the ribbon or provide the force needed to move the seat.

    "I could've had a Mi Querida!"   Nick Bardis
  • ForMudForMud Posts: 2,336 ✭✭✭✭✭

    Just pee in the shower....Problem solved....Sorry Frank.

  • ShawnOLShawnOL Posts: 9,675 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited August 2021

    Want to solve the issue? Just remove the **** seat and lid for a few weeks. They'll quit ****-ing after you put it back on.

    Trapped in the People's Communist Republic of Massachusetts.

  • Bob_LukenBob_Luken Posts: 10,833 ✭✭✭✭✭

    @peter4jc said:

    @Bob_Luken said:

    @peter4jc said:
    That last video w/ the ribbon and glue is fake as ****.

    you try it already?

    Nope. I just don't believe the weight of that 'floater' as he called it (to me, the term 'floater' when used in relation to a terlet is something different :p ) wouldn't be sufficient to overcome the friction of the ribbon or provide the force needed to move the seat.

    Yep, You're right. Plus I checked out the rest of the videos on the same Youtube channel. Lots of desperate fakery.

  • VegasFrankVegasFrank Posts: 18,344 ✭✭✭✭✭

    Funny, in thinking about it I realize that I have been putting the seat and the lid down for 20 years. I guess mine doesn't mind. Figures, she's been known to be defective.

    Disclaimer:  All trolling is provided for the sole entertainment purposes of the author only. Readers may find entertainment and hard core truths, but none are intended. Any resulting damaged feelings or arse chapping of the reader are the sole responsibility of the reader, to include, but not limited to: crying, anger, revenge pørn, and abandonment or deletion of ccom accounts. Offer void in Utah because Utah is terrible.
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