Twas the night before Christmas

Omg I forgot calvin! Fukfukfukfukfuk

Twas the night before Christmas
And all across the forum
All the smokes had been smoked
And now @Deadman would score 'em

Lotto winnings for Travis
Packed in boxes with care
In hopes that the post lady
Soon would be there

I sat in my chair
On the front porch
I grabbed a cigar
Picked up a new torch

I opened the zoom app
And what did I see?
A cigar with no band
From @EgoBoundary

The foot of my stick
I began to toast
While that santa-like @Yakster
Gave his coffee a roast

On that first page
With Ernest and Chris
Also was @Vision
Whose tank tops we miss

I glared at my screen
And it's tiles of four
Five pages of four!
Plus one with three more

When all of the sudden
Arose such a clatter
A girlish little scream
Scroll! Scroll! What's the matter?

There sat @Guitarded
"I'm begging you, please!"
A new LE Tat
While on his buy freeze

He sat with three vols
Paul, Glenn, and "Bob-Mike"
A full teeth set among them
For Christmas they'd like

O'er on the third page
With his patties of frost
Sat Florida Nick
Mourning Florida's loss

He was there with @IndustMech
They both in their coats
And @Stubble who told
Of a disturbance with goats

Onto page four!
The cool guys I found
The Püssy destroyer
And Paul with his hound

Ricky's slow drawl,
Paul's dog was berserk
Bryson was there
His nose in his work

I swiped to see Sherm
Watching the game
Not saying much
His smoke likely lame

As well on that page
The new guys with Peter
Taylor smoking a bomb
Wade wished for a heater

The bully was cheery
With a shït eating smile
Watching the cold guys
From in his house all the while

That last partial page,
Only two faces I saw
'Cause Jeff had a camera
With a lense flaw

The others were Patrick
And Wayne from upstate
Not a moment of silence
Lots of pee on the grate

Scroll more I could not
For roll had been taken
Those that were missing
Had me quite shaken

Sightings of Charlie
And David are rare
Thankfully Allan
Came up once for air

Saw Rodney just once
Shiz one less than that
@Far_North_64?
Dafuq's up with dat?

To Edward and @cbuck
And Mud in the morning
Sleep in some days!
Early A.M. is boring

Back on the vherf
Others aren't there
Which makes me remark
Why would I care?

Two guys in one cup
And ol' @Scotch_n_Smoke
@Michael_walk and the trolls
Are the ultimate JOKE

I'm down to the nub
Is there someone I forgot?
@CalvinAndHobo
The greatest, Mike's not

I say my goodbyes
To everyone right
Merry Christmas, Ccom
To my brothers, good night!