This is the source of a lot of stress the last few days. It is the only other gal, than my wife who has a piece of my heart.
If these kids only knew the power they have over us... People used to tell me if I ever had a little girl, she would have me wrapped around her finger and I would say, "Never". When she was born, she had me twisted in knots around her little finger before I could hand her to mommy.. Cherish that wondrous gift.
I have one grandson,he is two and yes I feel the same. He calls me papa. Pretty cute! Every time they FaceTime my wife,I hear him saying,"where's papa" and I have to show him I'm here. I'm certainly nothing special,but he thinks I am!
This little one has been the center of a battle the last week, involving children's services, non-blood relatives, the ER, doctors, Indian children welfare and her family.
As of yesterday, the wife and I have temporary guardianship of her.
In Fumo Pax Money can't buy happiness, but it can buy cigars and that's close enough.
This little one has been the center of a battle the last week, involving children's services, non-blood relatives, the ER, doctors, Indian children welfare and her family.
As of yesterday, the wife and I have temporary guardianship of her.
Good luck with that. Been there. And the kids suffer, always. Don't know you real well, but I would trust you in that situation. Non blood relatives and the ER sounds scary enough. It is good she has your care. My wife's son was just by with his little one. They could be twins. Made him go home and stop driving in this weather.
@0patience Don't know you either, but Tony, your family will be in my family rosary tonight. For what that's worth to ya, know you are in others' prayers and stay strong.
This little one has been the center of a battle the last week, involving children's services, non-blood relatives, the ER, doctors, Indian children welfare and her family.
As of yesterday, the wife and I have temporary guardianship of her.
One of the many many reasons you are my friend Tony!
-- "There's something that doesn't make sense. Let's go poke it with a stick."
Tony, best of luck with all the crap they are making you go through. She's a little Doll and I can see she already has your heart. Are you and the Mrs going to adopt her? You know you got a boat load of stand up nuts, I mean pillars of the community here that would vouch for you. Really hope all works out for her sake and you and your wife.
You can't dispel Ignorance if you retain Arrogance!
@Sleddog46 We hope that it doesn't come to having to take full custody of her. We're too close to retirement to start over. That's not saying we won't, just hoping it all turns out the way it needs to.
We've more or less already been through this once. We have a foster daughter that even though she is 23 now and has her own son, still calls momma all the time and is still my little "mouse".
Momma gives me a hard time, she tells me, "My husband, the big tough guy, taken down by a little girl."
This morning, I slept in, which is rare for me and evidently, didn't sit well with Willow, my little Indian. So she dragged momma in to wake me. I woke up to being smacked with her yelling "Appa". Evidently, I am Appa. So I get up, go into the kitchen, the wife just smiles and says, "Yep, big tough guy."
And I'm ok with that.
Post edited by 0patience on
In Fumo Pax Money can't buy happiness, but it can buy cigars and that's close enough.
It is awesome that you can be there for her. Praying for you, I have two great grand mothers that were 1/2 native American, one side, which my mother's father is from tried to ignore our heritage, on my mother's mothers side many of my cousins have embraced it. If nothing else you can teach this little one the history of your past so that it wont be forgotten. How I wished I new the history of my ancestors.
So we have met with Children's services and while they won't allow custody to the mother, they will allow custody of our son. Still a long process.
Not understanding how the mother can fail to step up. She refused to take the drug testing, counseling and follow the "plan" set up by children's services and she won't spend any time with the child.
Probably another week or so and custody will return to our son.
Problem is, now every time the house gets quiet, I start looking to see what she's into. LOL!
In Fumo Pax Money can't buy happiness, but it can buy cigars and that's close enough.
That's got to be tough for the child. Lucky she has such a honorable and straightforward grandfather. More power to you and your wife and son. My next cigar is dedicated to you all.
Well, I guess we have her a little longer. If these kids can find a way to screw things up, they do. I'm so disgusted with my son and his girlfriend right now. Failing a drug test makes no sense, then trying to say it's from cold medicines. Seriously?
I'm amazed at the mentality of these kids. Everything isn't their fault. They have excuses for everything. And now, we're the bad people, because we no longer want them in our house. And his girlfriend doesn't feel "safe" in our house, because we tell her to get off her ass and do things. WTF?
Keep wondering when they will grow up and start thinking about this child.
In Fumo Pax Money can't buy happiness, but it can buy cigars and that's close enough.
I'm kind of lost on all this. He went off on his mom tonight and that really didn't sit well with me. He then threatened to try and have his girlfriends mom get custody and we told him we already talked about it and then he called us uncaring grandparents.
I guess we are now. But the lying, stealing from me and the sponging off us has to stop. He's 29 now and life's about to slap him in the face. He'll either step up or he won't. I can't help him anymore. I guess that makes me a bad parent.
In Fumo Pax Money can't buy happiness, but it can buy cigars and that's close enough.
Don't be so hard on yourself Tony. It appears you have gone above and beyond what most parents would do. If he steps out on his own and falls on his face, as a father all you can do is pick him up, dust him off and hope he learned something. It is hurtful that your beautiful innocent little girl is in the middle of it all. My thoughts are with you and your family.
Friends don't let good friends smoke cheap cigars.
Tony, your description of the behavior of your son and his girlfriend fits the classic description of Millenials. They all seem to think the world owes them a living.
A very good good friend of mine (may he Rest In Peace), an Okie through and through, used to say that when a youngster turns 18 it was customary for a parent to ‘break his dinner plate’. I think the implied message came through quite clearly.
I'm amazed at the mentality of these kids. Everything isn't their fault. They have excuses for everything. And now, we're the bad people, because we no longer want them in our house. And his girlfriend doesn't feel "safe" in our house, because we tell her to get off her ass and do things. WTF?
Keep wondering when they will grow up and start thinking about this child.
Oh my God I could go on and on concerning some of these in my own family, nieces and nephews. My heart goes out to you, your wife, and that child.
I think maybe you've just described the real zombie apocalypse. It's here already.
WARNING: The above post may contain thoughts or ideas known to the State of Caliphornia to cause seething rage, confusion, distemper, nausea, perspiration, sphincter release, or cranial implosion to persons who implicitly trust only one news source, or find themselves at either the left or right political extreme. Proceed at your own risk.
"If you do not read the newspapers you're uninformed. If you do read the newspapers, you're misinformed." -- Mark Twain
One has to want to want to get off drugs in order for a person to start caring again. Drugs change people only to the worst of states. I am sorry your son got messed up in all that, but he can come back to you unfortunately it won't be until he wants to. I hope that day soon my friend I hope it's soon.
"We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give". Winston Churchill. MOW badge received.
Because of the failed drug tests, they came in and took my little indian. Then, they decided since my son is staying with us, that they could place her with my son's girlfriend's mom (other grandmother). Ok, I guess. So that was Friday. Today, I get a call from my wife.
Willow has been moved into protective custody, because they found drugs in other grandmother's house and with her 17 year old son. Perfect. What is with these people?
So now, we have to decide what we do. Talking to my lawyer, he says he can have her delivered to our house tomorrow, since we are the grandparents and native. But...... She has been placed in a stable home, the lawyer checked on it and are we really equipped to handle a baby? The answer, not really.
So, tomorrow we talk with children's services. My lawyer, children's services and my brother, the counselor all agree it is a bad idea for her, us and her parents for us to take her in. Her parents, my son and his girlfriend, need to realize just how serious this is.
It's kind of killing Momma, cause she is at odds with herself. Knowing what she should do and what her instincts as a grandmother tell her to do.
In Fumo Pax Money can't buy happiness, but it can buy cigars and that's close enough.
Tony, it sounds like it's time for you to tell your son to leave ASAP for the good of Willow. Your in a hard situation but you have to think of what's best for Willow. You shouldn't feel guilty for harboring your 29 year old son. It sound like he needs to grow up and take responsibility for his actions.
You can't dispel Ignorance if you retain Arrogance!
Comments
And for what ever reason, she can get this heart of stone to warm up.
Money can't buy happiness, but it can buy cigars and that's close enough.
As of yesterday, the wife and I have temporary guardianship of her.
Money can't buy happiness, but it can buy cigars and that's close enough.
Good luck with that. Been there. And the kids suffer, always. Don't know you real well, but I would trust you in that situation.
Non blood relatives and the ER sounds scary enough. It is good she has your care.
My wife's son was just by with his little one. They could be twins. Made him go home and stop driving in this weather.
Don't know you either, but Tony, your family will be in my family rosary tonight. For what that's worth to ya, know you are in others' prayers and stay strong.
We hope that it doesn't come to having to take full custody of her.
We're too close to retirement to start over. That's not saying we won't, just hoping it all turns out the way it needs to.
We've more or less already been through this once.
We have a foster daughter that even though she is 23 now and has her own son, still calls momma all the time and is still my little "mouse".
Momma gives me a hard time, she tells me, "My husband, the big tough guy, taken down by a little girl."
This morning, I slept in, which is rare for me and evidently, didn't sit well with Willow, my little Indian.
So she dragged momma in to wake me.
I woke up to being smacked with her yelling "Appa". Evidently, I am Appa.
So I get up, go into the kitchen, the wife just smiles and says, "Yep, big tough guy."
And I'm ok with that.
Money can't buy happiness, but it can buy cigars and that's close enough.
Still a long process.
Not understanding how the mother can fail to step up.
She refused to take the drug testing, counseling and follow the "plan" set up by children's services and she won't spend any time with the child.
Probably another week or so and custody will return to our son.
Problem is, now every time the house gets quiet, I start looking to see what she's into. LOL!
Money can't buy happiness, but it can buy cigars and that's close enough.
If these kids can find a way to screw things up, they do.
I'm so disgusted with my son and his girlfriend right now.
Failing a drug test makes no sense, then trying to say it's from cold medicines.
Seriously?
I'm amazed at the mentality of these kids. Everything isn't their fault.
They have excuses for everything.
And now, we're the bad people, because we no longer want them in our house.
And his girlfriend doesn't feel "safe" in our house, because we tell her to get off her ass and do things. WTF?
Keep wondering when they will grow up and start thinking about this child.
Money can't buy happiness, but it can buy cigars and that's close enough.
I'm kind of lost on all this.
He went off on his mom tonight and that really didn't sit well with me.
He then threatened to try and have his girlfriends mom get custody and we told him we already talked about it and then he called us uncaring grandparents.
I guess we are now.
But the lying, stealing from me and the sponging off us has to stop.
He's 29 now and life's about to slap him in the face. He'll either step up or he won't. I can't help him anymore.
I guess that makes me a bad parent.
Money can't buy happiness, but it can buy cigars and that's close enough.
It appears you have gone above and beyond what most parents would do.
If he steps out on his own and falls on his face, as a father all you can do is pick him up, dust him off and hope he learned something.
It is hurtful that your beautiful innocent little girl is in the middle of it all.
My thoughts are with you and your family.
Tony, your description of the behavior of your son and his girlfriend fits the classic description of Millenials. They all seem to think the world owes them a living.
A very good good friend of mine (may he Rest In Peace), an Okie through and through, used to say that when a youngster turns 18 it was customary for a parent to ‘break his dinner plate’. I think the implied message came through quite clearly.
I think maybe you've just described the real zombie apocalypse. It's here already.
"If you do not read the newspapers you're uninformed. If you do read the newspapers, you're misinformed." -- Mark Twain
MOW badge received.
Because of the failed drug tests, they came in and took my little indian.
Then, they decided since my son is staying with us, that they could place her with my son's girlfriend's mom (other grandmother).
Ok, I guess.
So that was Friday.
Today, I get a call from my wife.
Willow has been moved into protective custody, because they found drugs in other grandmother's house and with her 17 year old son.
Perfect. What is with these people?
So now, we have to decide what we do.
Talking to my lawyer, he says he can have her delivered to our house tomorrow, since we are the grandparents and native.
But......
She has been placed in a stable home, the lawyer checked on it and are we really equipped to handle a baby?
The answer, not really.
So, tomorrow we talk with children's services.
My lawyer, children's services and my brother, the counselor all agree it is a bad idea for her, us and her parents for us to take her in.
Her parents, my son and his girlfriend, need to realize just how serious this is.
It's kind of killing Momma, cause she is at odds with herself. Knowing what she should do and what her instincts as a grandmother tell her to do.
Money can't buy happiness, but it can buy cigars and that's close enough.