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corny joke

roland_7707roland_7707 Posts: 2,833 ✭✭✭
in Non Cigar Related
why do gorillas have such big nostrils? cuz they have fat fingers. hahahah
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    Andrew_DzikoskiAndrew_Dzikoski Posts: 381 ✭✭✭
    Two seals walk in to a club...
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    j0z3rj0z3r Posts: 9,403 ✭✭
    Andrew Dzikoski:
    Two seals walk in to a club...
    Variation: A baby seal walks into a club...
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    bandyt09bandyt09 Posts: 4,335 ✭✭✭✭✭
    Two guys walk into a bar, third one ducks............
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    roland_7707roland_7707 Posts: 2,833 ✭✭✭
    Why do cemetarys have fences? because people are dying to get in
    One God, One Truth
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    Andrew_DzikoskiAndrew_Dzikoski Posts: 381 ✭✭✭
    Two muffins are in the oven baking when one turns the other and say "It's getting hot in here" The other say "Holy S!!t a talking muffin!!"
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    Andrew_DzikoskiAndrew_Dzikoski Posts: 381 ✭✭✭
    Two boys go out on a walk. One looks down and said, "look at those, those are deer tracks my dad told me about them." The second boy says no those are elk tracks, my dad told me about them. Then the first boy says, "No those are deer tracks." The second boy says, "NO those are elk tracks." One hour later they were run over by a train.
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    xmacroxmacro Posts: 3,402 ✭
    Why did the walrus go to the tupperware party? He was looking for a tight seal

    Why don't blind guys skydive? It scares the hell out of the dog
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    The SniperThe Sniper Posts: 3,910 ✭
    Q: How do you catch a unique rabbit?

    A: Unique up on it!

    Q: How do you catch a TAME rabbit?

    A: The TAME way!

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    GentlemanGentleman Posts: 152 ✭
    Reminds me of Robin Williams when he does those quickfire jokes in the movies.

    How do you make a tissue dance? Put a little boogie in it.
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    xmacroxmacro Posts: 3,402 ✭
    So many corny jokes . . . this is all I can say about them:

    image

    How do you know a blond has been using a computer? It has white-out all over the screen

    Why did it take the blond 4 hrs to make a pitcher of orange juice? The carton said "concentrate" on it
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    lilwing88lilwing88 Posts: 2,812 ✭✭✭
    Why did the girl fall off the swing? Cuz she had no arms!
    Guns don't kill people, Daddies with pretty daughters do…..
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    kuzi16kuzi16 Posts: 14,633 ✭✭✭✭
    a black guy, a white guy and a chines guy walk into a bar.
    the bartender looks at them and asks "Is this some sort of joke?"
    Kuzi's Forum Links Page
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    roland_7707roland_7707 Posts: 2,833 ✭✭✭
    what do you call skydiving lawyers.......skeet......no offence to any lawyer out there.
    One God, One Truth
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    cholmes8310cholmes8310 Posts: 1,585
    Andrew Dzikoski:
    Two muffins are in the oven baking when one turns the other and say "It's getting hot in here" The other say "Holy S!!t a talking muffin!!"
    someone's a two and a half men fan... wait, besides me that is
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    bigbgballzbigbgballz Posts: 283 ✭
    Why do blondes have curtains on the computer monitor?, cause it has windows!
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    LukoLuko Posts: 2,003 ✭✭
    What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs in a pile of leaves? Russell.
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    j0z3rj0z3r Posts: 9,403 ✭✭
    What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs on your doorstep? Matt
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    mrpillowmrpillow Posts: 464
    So a bear walks into a bar, and orders a glass of whiskey.
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    The SniperThe Sniper Posts: 3,910 ✭
    A guy with no arms or legs in the middle of the ocean? BOB.
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    The SniperThe Sniper Posts: 3,910 ✭
    A spanish gal with no legs? CONSUELO.

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    mrpillowmrpillow Posts: 464
    And a beer. And the bartender says to the bear, "Hey, whats with the big pause?".
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    cabinetmakercabinetmaker Posts: 2,560 ✭✭
    mrpillow:
    And a beer. And the bartender says to the bear, "Hey, whats with the big pause?".
    I read the first part and was like Wtf??? Lol...

    dirty joke ... a white horse falls into the mud..
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    kuzi16kuzi16 Posts: 14,633 ✭✭✭✭
    mrpillow:
    And a beer. And the bartender says to the bear, "Hey, whats with the big pause?".
    im gunna use that.


    seriously.
    Kuzi's Forum Links Page
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    cabinetmakercabinetmaker Posts: 2,560 ✭✭
    How do you know when a blonde is having a bad day?



    her tampon is behind her ear and she can't find her pencil.
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    JdoraisJdorais Posts: 652 ✭
    what do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back?



    A stick.
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    The SniperThe Sniper Posts: 3,910 ✭
    Why dont sharks eat lawyers?

    Professional courtesy.

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    The SniperThe Sniper Posts: 3,910 ✭
    What do you call 10,000 dead lawyers on the bottom of the ocean?

    A good start...

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    roland_7707roland_7707 Posts: 2,833 ✭✭✭
    a little pig walked into a bar and ordered 5 root beers and paid for them. once he had drank them he asked the barkeep where the bathroom was and left. a second little pig did the same thing ordered 5 rootbeers asked where the bathroom was and left. this happened till the fifth little pig. he came in and ordered 5 root beers and paid and when drunk, he started for the door, the barkeep stopped him and said the the other little pigs had went to the bathroom when finished and wondered if he was going to do the same thing. the little pig replied, no, im the fifth little pig, i go wee wee wee all the way home.
    One God, One Truth
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    gmill880gmill880 Posts: 5,947 ✭
    Is a fly with no wings a walk or is it still a fly ?
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    roland_7707roland_7707 Posts: 2,833 ✭✭✭
    What did the fly say when it swam into a wall?......Dam
    One God, One Truth
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