An Open Letter to Rocky Patel: a story of why I will NEVER touch another RP branded cigar in my life
jgibv
Posts: 9,244 ✭✭✭✭✭
This is a story of my experiences with Rocky Patel as a brand, interacting with Nish Patel, and how to **not** interact with your "customers"...
Wanted to post while thoughts are fresh in my mind, pics will be uploaded tomorrow.....
(EDIT 3/16/15 morning: Fixed typos/phrasing, uploaded pics, and added more context)
(Edit #2 -- got the inspiration for this title from Kuzi's "Open Letter to Gurkha" post from a while back. Hope you don't mind me using a similar title for this.)
Went to a big cigar event today in Columbus (Smoking Tent at Easton mall)...
There were about a dozen or so vendors all passing out cigars, most of the "big guys" were there (DE, General, Ashton, RP) all touting their "highly rated cigars" and throwing around marketing buzzwords at a rate that would make the head of a PR firm jealous. (Uggg, spare me please.)
But anyways, was looking forward to the event (went last year and had a fun time) .... some smokes, drinks, and spending time with my old man and a couple friends that went. (Also got to meet up with C-Love and his buddy so that was pretty cool)
The smokes were mostly larger RGs/vitolas but it was fun to get some things that I would probably have never tried otherwise.
Well, at the RP booth -- there were a few sales reps but the "big man" Nish Patel was also there talking about the new "Prohibition" cigar that he was giving out as samples. I picked the San Andreas version, and have heard a lot about this smoke so figured I'd give it a shot. Lit it up as my 3rd cigar of the day and I was pleasantly surprised.
I don't smoke much RP & it's prob been 5+ yrs since I bought any of that brand but this 1 was going well and I was going to give the brand a second look based on this experience.....
The cigar started off pretty good, flavors were decent, burn was good, and it was performing well.
Pump the brakes.
.....seems I got ahead of myself....
About 2 inches in on a toro the wrapper started unraveling mid-way up the cigar.
As you can see from the pics below it wasn't unraveling near the cut (which happens sometimes if the cut is bad), and it wasn't unraveling near the burn line (which I've had happen a couple times if I don't get it lit correctly.
Now, I tried to "power through it" and hold the wrapper together.....but it only got worse every time I touched it. So figured this is a lost cause, not worth messing with anymore since I had a whole bag of cigars still. I put down the RP, let it go out, and grabbed another brand from my bag and lit it up (Luchador---much better).
Now, I know RP is often right up there with "Gurkha" on QC issues, ratings hype, MSRP hype, etc.....and normally I wouldn't think twice about this kind of thing I'd just curse at the cigar, and write off that brand but since the reps & Nish were still at the event I figured I'd at least stop by their booth and let them know what happened.
I mean they can't fix their product if they don't know of the issues right? And here's a cigar they personally handed to me a few hours ago and I'm having problems with it.....that's good customer feedback right?
Because it was honestly a pretty decent smoke up until the point that it unraveled/blew up.....and I wasn't looking for a freebie (because again, why take another chance with an exploding cigar when I have a whole bag of others)....but wanted to see how the reps/Nish would respond.
So I walk over and talk to Nish and preface the conversation with "I'm not lookin for a handout or anything I just want you to know I was enjoying this cigar until it unraveled on me and was no longer smokable......"
So Nish takes the cigar, looks at it....and the first thing he says.....I **** you not is:
"Well the problem is you cut it too far down....that's not a good cut. You need to cut it higher up."
My face when I hear that:
I really couldn't believe what he said. It took me a minute to process it and it was all I could to do hold my tongue and not say "Uhh are you **** kidding me?"
Customer service 101 failure right here. You obviously have a faulty product and the problem ain't with the cut buck-o.
So I say to him "Umm, ok. Maybe I cut it a little low but that's not where it's unraveling. Are you trying to tell me that cut is causing it to unravel in the middle of the cigar? Because that's not the problem here?"
So Nish replies:
"Well ok yeah that's not the reason it unraveled but it's like if you bought a brand new sports car but it came with old worn out bad tires. You're not going to get the true experience of the car, it just won't run right."
My face when he says this:
I'm just thinking to myself "ok yes you're right in that scenario a car wouldn't run as well as it would on new tires, but then again those old tires shouldn't cause the transmission to blow up you dumb fvcker."
I was so dumbfounded by his response and analogy though it took me a minute to respond but before I could he pulls out a few more RP cigars (different brands, not the prohibition) and says:
"here why don't you try another one, you said you didn't want a freebie but go ahead give us another shot."
I say "no it's really ok I just wanted to bring this issue to your attention."
And then Nish replies "well I actually know exactly what happened with your cigar here. One of the reps or someone must have dropped it and put it back in the box as a handout. So it was damaged before it got to you."
(I am thinking to myself oh ok so it wasn't the way I cut it that caused the problem now? You S.O.B.)
So I say "well I understand that happens, I could see it maybe got damaged in transit or something, no worries thank you for your time."
And again he offers another cigar to me and is insistent I take one and he says "Ok here take this RP 15th, its one of the "top-5 cigars in the world" better than Padron, kind of like a 26 and 64 combined only better, you try this one. It's our highest end cigar; you'll like it. (There was more marketing gibberish here too)."
I take the cigar, thank him for his time and head back to my table, absolutely dumbfounded by the experience I just had.
Got back to the table, shared the experience with the folks I was sitting with, (they are all in sales as well) and they too were dumbfounded by Nish's response.
The general consensus was "that's sh!tty customer service"
Overall I assume that because I'm younger than most of the other people at the event (I'm 27) .... Nish thought oh look at this kid, must not know what he's doing, he caused the problem and is just looking for a free cigar. Because that's the way he seemed to treat me.
I will give him a nod for offering a "replacement cigar" but that is absolute horse **** trying to blame the problem on me. It took far too long for me to call him out on his bullsh!t before he owned up to the issue but I was glad (albeit quite confused by his responses) to see he finally admitted the problem wasn't due to the way I cut it.
.....But wait......there's more......
I was back at the table and look over the cigar he gave me. This one was still in cello and I realize it too has a damaged/cracked wrapper.
I. Couldn't. Fvcking. Believe. It.
Debated going back up and showing/telling him just to try and prove a point but I know it would have fallen on deaf ears and it wasn't worth my time or wasting my breath.
Just look at this....unbelievable.
(Took it out of cello and got pics when I got home because phone was dying)
Final Grades:
Customer service --- F F (double F because 1 F wasn't harsh enough)
Product quality --- D-
Relying on marketing buzzwords & "ratings" to sell your products: A+
Fu*k you Rocky Patel as a brand, seriously ....fvck you.
And you are a sand-baggin' P.O.S. Nish, that's a bold fvcking response trying to blame your customer when you know it's not their fault.
I will never touch another RP branded cigar, accessory, etc. ever again because I refuse to support your piece of **** company and attitude towards your customers.
You are garbage.
Wanted to post while thoughts are fresh in my mind, pics will be uploaded tomorrow.....
(EDIT 3/16/15 morning: Fixed typos/phrasing, uploaded pics, and added more context)
(Edit #2 -- got the inspiration for this title from Kuzi's "Open Letter to Gurkha" post from a while back. Hope you don't mind me using a similar title for this.)
Went to a big cigar event today in Columbus (Smoking Tent at Easton mall)...
There were about a dozen or so vendors all passing out cigars, most of the "big guys" were there (DE, General, Ashton, RP) all touting their "highly rated cigars" and throwing around marketing buzzwords at a rate that would make the head of a PR firm jealous. (Uggg, spare me please.)
But anyways, was looking forward to the event (went last year and had a fun time) .... some smokes, drinks, and spending time with my old man and a couple friends that went. (Also got to meet up with C-Love and his buddy so that was pretty cool)
The smokes were mostly larger RGs/vitolas but it was fun to get some things that I would probably have never tried otherwise.
Well, at the RP booth -- there were a few sales reps but the "big man" Nish Patel was also there talking about the new "Prohibition" cigar that he was giving out as samples. I picked the San Andreas version, and have heard a lot about this smoke so figured I'd give it a shot. Lit it up as my 3rd cigar of the day and I was pleasantly surprised.
I don't smoke much RP & it's prob been 5+ yrs since I bought any of that brand but this 1 was going well and I was going to give the brand a second look based on this experience.....
The cigar started off pretty good, flavors were decent, burn was good, and it was performing well.
Pump the brakes.
.....seems I got ahead of myself....
About 2 inches in on a toro the wrapper started unraveling mid-way up the cigar.
As you can see from the pics below it wasn't unraveling near the cut (which happens sometimes if the cut is bad), and it wasn't unraveling near the burn line (which I've had happen a couple times if I don't get it lit correctly.
Now, I tried to "power through it" and hold the wrapper together.....but it only got worse every time I touched it. So figured this is a lost cause, not worth messing with anymore since I had a whole bag of cigars still. I put down the RP, let it go out, and grabbed another brand from my bag and lit it up (Luchador---much better).
Now, I know RP is often right up there with "Gurkha" on QC issues, ratings hype, MSRP hype, etc.....and normally I wouldn't think twice about this kind of thing I'd just curse at the cigar, and write off that brand but since the reps & Nish were still at the event I figured I'd at least stop by their booth and let them know what happened.
I mean they can't fix their product if they don't know of the issues right? And here's a cigar they personally handed to me a few hours ago and I'm having problems with it.....that's good customer feedback right?
Because it was honestly a pretty decent smoke up until the point that it unraveled/blew up.....and I wasn't looking for a freebie (because again, why take another chance with an exploding cigar when I have a whole bag of others)....but wanted to see how the reps/Nish would respond.
So I walk over and talk to Nish and preface the conversation with "I'm not lookin for a handout or anything I just want you to know I was enjoying this cigar until it unraveled on me and was no longer smokable......"
So Nish takes the cigar, looks at it....and the first thing he says.....I **** you not is:
"Well the problem is you cut it too far down....that's not a good cut. You need to cut it higher up."
My face when I hear that:
I really couldn't believe what he said. It took me a minute to process it and it was all I could to do hold my tongue and not say "Uhh are you **** kidding me?"
Customer service 101 failure right here. You obviously have a faulty product and the problem ain't with the cut buck-o.
So I say to him "Umm, ok. Maybe I cut it a little low but that's not where it's unraveling. Are you trying to tell me that cut is causing it to unravel in the middle of the cigar? Because that's not the problem here?"
So Nish replies:
"Well ok yeah that's not the reason it unraveled but it's like if you bought a brand new sports car but it came with old worn out bad tires. You're not going to get the true experience of the car, it just won't run right."
My face when he says this:
I'm just thinking to myself "ok yes you're right in that scenario a car wouldn't run as well as it would on new tires, but then again those old tires shouldn't cause the transmission to blow up you dumb fvcker."
I was so dumbfounded by his response and analogy though it took me a minute to respond but before I could he pulls out a few more RP cigars (different brands, not the prohibition) and says:
"here why don't you try another one, you said you didn't want a freebie but go ahead give us another shot."
I say "no it's really ok I just wanted to bring this issue to your attention."
And then Nish replies "well I actually know exactly what happened with your cigar here. One of the reps or someone must have dropped it and put it back in the box as a handout. So it was damaged before it got to you."
(I am thinking to myself oh ok so it wasn't the way I cut it that caused the problem now? You S.O.B.)
So I say "well I understand that happens, I could see it maybe got damaged in transit or something, no worries thank you for your time."
And again he offers another cigar to me and is insistent I take one and he says "Ok here take this RP 15th, its one of the "top-5 cigars in the world" better than Padron, kind of like a 26 and 64 combined only better, you try this one. It's our highest end cigar; you'll like it. (There was more marketing gibberish here too)."
I take the cigar, thank him for his time and head back to my table, absolutely dumbfounded by the experience I just had.
Got back to the table, shared the experience with the folks I was sitting with, (they are all in sales as well) and they too were dumbfounded by Nish's response.
The general consensus was "that's sh!tty customer service"
Overall I assume that because I'm younger than most of the other people at the event (I'm 27) .... Nish thought oh look at this kid, must not know what he's doing, he caused the problem and is just looking for a free cigar. Because that's the way he seemed to treat me.
I will give him a nod for offering a "replacement cigar" but that is absolute horse **** trying to blame the problem on me. It took far too long for me to call him out on his bullsh!t before he owned up to the issue but I was glad (albeit quite confused by his responses) to see he finally admitted the problem wasn't due to the way I cut it.
.....But wait......there's more......
I was back at the table and look over the cigar he gave me. This one was still in cello and I realize it too has a damaged/cracked wrapper.
I. Couldn't. Fvcking. Believe. It.
Debated going back up and showing/telling him just to try and prove a point but I know it would have fallen on deaf ears and it wasn't worth my time or wasting my breath.
Just look at this....unbelievable.
(Took it out of cello and got pics when I got home because phone was dying)
Final Grades:
Customer service --- F F (double F because 1 F wasn't harsh enough)
Product quality --- D-
Relying on marketing buzzwords & "ratings" to sell your products: A+
Fu*k you Rocky Patel as a brand, seriously ....fvck you.
And you are a sand-baggin' P.O.S. Nish, that's a bold fvcking response trying to blame your customer when you know it's not their fault.
I will never touch another RP branded cigar, accessory, etc. ever again because I refuse to support your piece of **** company and attitude towards your customers.
You are garbage.
* I have a new address as of 3/24/18 *
2
Comments
2015 Gang War - East Coast
Enola Gay - Target #29
My favorite cigar list here
Feel free to share this story with any BOTL/SOTL's you know. (I'm going to try and find a way go post it on twitter and facebook)
Working in sales myself, I wanted to just share this and get the word out, because I would never treat my customers this way (hell if I did I'd be fired) and would never want to do business with a company that acted this way.
Yes bro not surprised. I could totally see that sticker story happening after talking to Nish for 5 minutes. They seem to think they're above everyone, own the world, and can do no wrong was the impression I got.
LOL about the zuchinni guy, that would've been hilarious. But Nish probably would've told him how he was making it wrong.
* I have a new address as of 3/24/18 *
(also posted to twitter) --- thanks to all for helping to spread the word.
just very off putting that the exec vp (nish patel) would act like this to a customer. too many other good cigar companies out there to be supporting bullsh!t like this IMO.
everyone else was great.....(sam leccia & eric espinoza were especially cool dudes and stand out in my mind.)
* I have a new address as of 3/24/18 *
But the second "replacement" cigar, the 15th anniversary Nish pulled directly out of his bre*st (forgot we can't say that word) pocket on his sport coat. So IDK man. Just a real off-putting experience. I could give a **** less about the damaged smokes and probably wouldn't have even done a write up, but the way he interacted with me was just mind-blowing, and not in a good way.
* I have a new address as of 3/24/18 *
MOW badge received.
"If you do not read the newspapers you're uninformed. If you do read the newspapers, you're misinformed." -- Mark Twain
I'm surprised Nish didn't say, "No, no, he's not dead. He's just pinin' for the fjords."
gib·ber·nish
'jib(?)rNISH/
noun
marketing scheme using unintelligible or meaningless speech in an attempt to deceive others into believing a mediocre, self destructing dog rocket, with an attractive label is an award winning cigar.
"I regrettably spent $120 after listening to gibbernish"
synonyms: nonsense, garbage, bullsit, rubbish;
thanks for the laughs & for lightening up this thread; needed it.
* I have a new address as of 3/24/18 *
KLMOW Badge 8/2014
Team Trident 2014
i really didn't want it but he was super insistent that i take it....i should've just walked away.
but hell i wouldn't be surprised if he knew the fvckin thing was cracked too and was just trollin' my a$$...
* I have a new address as of 3/24/18 *
RP=Real Peckerhead. And Nish... what the hell is a Nish anyhow ?
"I've got a great cigar collection - it's actually not a collection, because that would imply I wasn't going to smoke ever last one of 'em." - Ron White
you SOB. lol
god damn it; you & ccom get TOW nominee
* I have a new address as of 3/24/18 *
"I've got a great cigar collection - it's actually not a collection, because that would imply I wasn't going to smoke ever last one of 'em." - Ron White