Dumbest thing done while drunk
Rhamlin
Posts: 9,137 ✭✭✭✭✭
what's your dumbest story. Mine is while traveling home from the boat (many many many years ago) I got **** faced drunk at Saint Luis airport. Woke up the next morning in a hotel. The quick thinker I am I quickly called my company crew dispatcher so she could set me up with another flight to Cincinnati. Imagine my embarrassment when several hours later they called me back to let me know I was in Chicago. Took a while to live that down.
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I don't typically drink wine, but about 6 months ago my wife cracked open a fortified red that she didn't like. I damn near downed the thing without thinking about it. When I woke up in the morning, my kitchen was a complete mess. I was informed that try as they might, no one could get me to stop cooking.
I cooked up about a pound of mac-n-cheese from scratch, made 2 roasts with about 4 pounds of veggies, caramelized every onion I could find for later, roasted all my garlic, made some fresh squeezed OJ, and to top it off I made 4 pounds of cookie dough.
I had the fridge absolutely stuffed."Cooking isn't about struggling; It's about pleasure. It's like sǝx, with a wider variety of sauces."
At any given time the urge to sing "In The Jungle" is just a whim away... A whim away... A whim away...10 -
Abruptly found myself in the shower dancing with the professor's wife Magda, nothing but a wet washrag between us. No idea how we got there. Last thing I remembered a crowd was dancing in the attic and someone stepped off the flooring and busted waist deep into the room below. Next thing I knew, Magda. What broke us out of our reverie was, someone rushed into the master hollering that I needed to sober up quick so's I could drive this girl Linda home. Me, cause I was known for my ability to grab hold of myself, while everyone else was too smashed. Linda, cause she had decided life wasn't worth it and wanted to dive head first off the balcony into the yard.
Magda. Hot number.
Linda chaste.
Youth. Dissolute.
“It has been a source of great pain to me to have met with so many among [my] opponents who had not the liberality to distinguish between political and social opposition; who transferred at once to the person, the hatred they bore to his political opinions.” —Thomas Jefferson (1808)
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Ah memories.
"Cooking isn't about struggling; It's about pleasure. It's like sǝx, with a wider variety of sauces."
At any given time the urge to sing "In The Jungle" is just a whim away... A whim away... A whim away...1 -
Man could I fill this thread. Change the "What" to a "Who" and we could have another one.
I guess the most recent family friendly idiocy was when I was at at a party with old high school friends, during a blizzard. We got into an argument over whether we could still kick a 30 yard field goal. Bear in mind we are in our mid forties and there is 6 plus inches of snow on the ground and I am not sure we cold have made 30 yards when we were 18.
We had our sober friend navigate the storm to bring us to the high school field, climbed (a very generous description of our ascent) the 8 foot high chain link fence, and proceeded to pull every muscle as we fell on our **** in the snow and missed every attempt by miles.
The cop who finally escorted us off the premises laughed his ass off as we limped our soaked and sore bodies to the fence and flung ourselves over to retreat home in utter defeat to our angry wives.
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Let's just say there's a reason I only drink coffee or club soda for 30 plus years now!7
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In my early 20's, at a party and was dared to drive my Mustang into a courtyard of my apartment complex at the time and do donuts. Soo... drove into the middle of the courtyard, got nervous and rather than head back to the road, decided to head for the parking lot. Tried to drive between 2 buildings, sadly there was not enough room. Hit buildings on both sides of my car, fortunately had enough speed to not get wedged. Tore the passenger side door handle off and left dents and scratches down both sides of my car.5
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Its been a long time but is the reason I don't drink whiskey anymore. In my early twenties at a party my wife tells everyone how I can out drink anyone. Well, she was right but after a bit I told her we had to go. She didn't want to yet but as I was running out the door before getting sick all over the house she followed and stopped a few times more on the way home. Then after passing out at home I must have woke up and went to a corner to relieve myself except there was not a toilet there!5
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Woke up naked in a bathtub in a house I don't remember ever being in. After finally finding the door I found my clothes in a bedroom across the haul were a female was sleeping face down. Snuck out of the house and after figuring out what town I was in I called a friend to come get me. Proceeded to find my truck and luckily another friend called and asked me where I was because my truck was blocking his wife's car in the driveway. How I got 75 miles away from my truck I don't know. This is one reason I rarely drink, if I do its beer. And noway do I drink Jack Daniels anymore. I'm not a very nice guy when you add that so I stay away.3
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It used to be a pretty clear cut answer. I have a new contender for the dumbest.
I once spent a night in jail with only a pair of shorts on painted purple from the waist up. I was the letter E so after I was removed from the football game for a public intox they could only spell "GO BARS". I was 21. The university cops wanted to call my parents. I laughed at them. They took me to jail.
I paid my ex a late night visit last Tuesday. My Wednesday morning started at Walgreen's picking up plan b. I am an idiot.
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ooh, we don't have time for all the stories, I guess the one dumbest thing I've done while drunk was
kept on drinking.
Others have stories, memories, I just got the hangover.
Lost a few friends, too.
WARNING: The above post may contain thoughts or ideas known to the State of Caliphornia to cause seething rage, confusion, distemper, nausea, perspiration, sphincter release, or cranial implosion to persons who implicitly trust only one news source, or find themselves at either the left or right political extreme. Proceed at your own risk.
"If you do not read the newspapers you're uninformed. If you do read the newspapers, you're misinformed." -- Mark Twain3 -
This went to a potentially dark place relatively quickly.
I have a fair share of those stories as well. Condolences."Cooking isn't about struggling; It's about pleasure. It's like sǝx, with a wider variety of sauces."
At any given time the urge to sing "In The Jungle" is just a whim away... A whim away... A whim away...0 -
like I am really going to admit this in public. I wouldn't do well in jail...
-- "There's something that doesn't make sense. Let's go poke it with a stick."4 -
Somethings better left unsaid3
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Whoa @Echambers, somebody's #tat_tuesday got out of control, huh?pelirrojo said:It used to be a pretty clear cut answer. I have a new contender for the dumbest.
I once spent a night in jail with only a pair of shorts on painted purple from the waist up. I was the letter E so after I was removed from the football game for a public intox they could only spell "GO BARS". I was 21. The university cops wanted to call my parents. I laughed at them. They took me to jail.
I paid my ex a late night visit last Tuesday. My Wednesday morning started at Walgreen's picking up plan b. I am an idiot.
Thanks @pelirrojo that made me laugh for some twisted reason Team O'Donnell FTW!2 -
Too many to tell in one sitting. At least the ones I can remember anyway.
Life is too short to smoke bad cigars!!!
Oh when the Blues, Oh when the Blues, Oh when the Blues go marching in!
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Here's a little drunk secret.......Once, when I was drunk, I posted on the cigar.com forum.......8
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Tod I agree, beer and friends is no good and everyone should stay away. Now that's out of the way, have you ever had this
"We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give". Winston Churchill.
MOW badge received.0 -
It is stupid good! Or so I've been informed by reliable sources."We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give". Winston Churchill.
MOW badge received.0 -
Stupid good........I can identify with one of those words, lolPatrickbrick said:It is stupid good! Or so I've been informed by reliable sources.
Haven't tried it. I think I might have an older special release from them in the 20 can fridge I have.
Oh wait, is that alcohol? Yuck..........1 -
20 count fridge to go with the 20 count humidor... Hmm
"I drink a great deal. I sleep a little, and I smoke cigar after cigar. That is why I am in two-hundred-percent form."
-- Winston Churchill
"LET'S GO FRANCIS" Peter1 -
One time at a party, got blitzed and ended up out in the pouring rain. Apparently booze turns you into a ninja cuz I decided to climb up to the Second story balcony, in the pouring rain! Made it all the way up, slipped on the rail and face planted the earth!4
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OuchieSM0K3Y said:One time at a party, got blitzed and ended up out in the pouring rain. Apparently booze turns you into a ninja cuz I decided to climb up to the Second story balcony, in the pouring rain! Made it all the way up, slipped on the rail and face planted the earth!1 -
i did a lot of dumb things while i was in altered state but the dumbest was when i wanted to get drunk but didn't get drunk. I was 19 and a Marine grunt in Vietnam. A good stateside friend sent me a bottle of vodka. I was going to drink it but my platoon was leaving our company sized hilltop position the next AM on a three day combat patrol. hid the fact i got the vodka and after dusk i crawled out of my fighting hole and buried the bottle about 30 yards down the hill under the barbed wire right next to a claymore.. I figured to dig it up on my return and ty one on. Our patrol was in the mountains and was long and hard but we had no enemy contact. We got back at dusk on the third day. i returned to my hole and grabbed my e-tool and went in search of my vodka. I dug where I buried it and couldn't find it. I dug three holes that night and no vodka. Over the next two nights i must have dug ten holes and came up dry. As far as i know the vodka is still buried on a little hilltop in Vietnam.8
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Only dumb thing I do now a days while drunk is argue with the ol' lady.
I know better because she's ALWAYS right.
Before I met her however. I got drunk with some friends and got to talking about how fast I was when I played soccer in college. 6 shots of jaeger later a buddy of mine and I decided to have a race running between stop signs on our street. Need less to say I won.... however when I tried to slow down I fell face first blocking my fall with my hand and broke my wrist. 2 surgerys later my wrist has never been the same."Come party with me in Tennessee for my birthday July we can smoke in the Smokey's."0 -
More than you would beleve!0
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Playing with your fully loaded 357
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