it is Rumored that HAYS is beggining to Grow and Beard to Challlenge Tim B....... The BEARD.....
Cant wait to see this!
Tims beard just snuck up on Hays' and shaved it off......contest OVER....
Actually Tim's Beard just threatened to shave Hays' beard and Hays' beard hairs fell out.
LMAO
Actually, though The Beard is comprised of diamond-sharp straight ligero hairs, I have contracted with our resident Alien to construct a new beard of my own of an amazing, indestructible material known as dontfuckwithmeium.... ;-)
¨The cure for anything is salt water: sweat, tears, or the sea¨ - Isak Dinesen
¨Only two people walk around in this world beardless - boys and women - and I am neither one.¨
Henri Loyrette director of the Louvre Museum in Paris announced today;
"The Louvre Museum is proud to have reached a tennative agreement with Tim "The Beard" for a special exhibit of several of Tims beard hairs, scheduled to be on display starting May 1, 2010"
No further details are available at this time on duration of the exhibit or financials. There is speculation that the museum is in negotiatians for a long term exhibit and are prepared to spare no expense so that "The Beard" is displayed in all its glory.....
But this cannot be, as a previous post pointed out that the beard cannot be shaved. So how are they acquiring these hairs?
Henri Loyrette director of the Louvre Museum in Paris announced today;
"The Louvre Museum is proud to have reached a tennative agreement with Tim "The Beard" for a special exhibit of several of Tims beard hairs, scheduled to be on display starting May 1, 2010"
No further details are available at this time on duration of the exhibit or financials. There is speculation that the museum is in negotiatians for a long term exhibit and are prepared to spare no expense so that "The Beard" is displayed in all its glory.....
But this cannot be, as a previous post pointed out that the beard cannot be shaved. So how are they acquiring these hairs?
Henri Loyrette director of the Louvre Museum in Paris announced today;
"The Louvre Museum is proud to have reached a tennative agreement with Tim "The Beard" for a special exhibit of several of Tims beard hairs, scheduled to be on display starting May 1, 2010"
No further details are available at this time on duration of the exhibit or financials. There is speculation that the museum is in negotiatians for a long term exhibit and are prepared to spare no expense so that "The Beard" is displayed in all its glory.....
But this cannot be, as a previous post pointed out that the beard cannot be shaved. So how are they acquiring these hairs?
If "The Beard" agrees anything is possible....
Yes, even if The Beard must construct a new shaving device made up of Triple Ligero beard fragments.
Henri Loyrette director of the Louvre Museum in Paris announced today;
"The Louvre Museum is proud to have reached a tennative agreement with Tim "The Beard" for a special exhibit of several of Tims beard hairs, scheduled to be on display starting May 1, 2010"
No further details are available at this time on duration of the exhibit or financials. There is speculation that the museum is in negotiatians for a long term exhibit and are prepared to spare no expense so that "The Beard" is displayed in all its glory.....
But this cannot be, as a previous post pointed out that the beard cannot be shaved. So how are they acquiring these hairs?
If "The Beard" agrees anything is possible....
Yes, even if The Beard must construct a new shaving device made up of Triple Ligero beard fragments.
This one is easy........ Tim's beard will just grow another beard, donate it, and write off $2.5 million on his income tax.
Guns don't kill people, Daddies with pretty daughters do…..
According to the ancient Mayan Calender in the year 2012 all beard hairs worldwide will simultaneously fall out in deference to Tim's Beard, known around the world as "The Year Of The Beard" The hieroglyphics clearly show a bearded serpent called Kukulkhanligero, which translates "the great serpent with ligero hair".
Henri Loyrette director of the Louvre Museum in Paris announced today;
"The Louvre Museum is proud to have reached a tennative agreement with Tim "The Beard" for a special exhibit of several of Tims beard hairs, scheduled to be on display starting May 1, 2010"
No further details are available at this time on duration of the exhibit or financials. There is speculation that the museum is in negotiatians for a long term exhibit and are prepared to spare no expense so that "The Beard" is displayed in all its glory.....
I got through the 1st line of this and figured that this was serious!
Then realized! Oh yeah, this is the TB appreciation thread! Too funny! Too gullible!!
Henri Loyrette director of the Louvre Museum in Paris announced today;
"The Louvre Museum is proud to have reached a tennative agreement with Tim "The Beard" for a special exhibit of several of Tims beard hairs, scheduled to be on display starting May 1, 2010"
No further details are available at this time on duration of the exhibit or financials. There is speculation that the museum is in negotiatians for a long term exhibit and are prepared to spare no expense so that "The Beard" is displayed in all its glory.....
I got through the 1st line of this and figured that this was serious!
Then realized! Oh yeah, this is the TB appreciation thread! Too funny! Too gullible!!
I wonder if tim reads this thread to cheer up if hes having a bad day. How can you read this and NOT laugh out loud.
Tim never needs cheering up. His beard gives off oils that contain Zoloft.
Tim actually invented and patented Zoloft in a quest to find something, natural or chemical, that would calm the rage of The Beard whenever it was around inferior beards. He finally realized there was no quelling the rage so he moved from his home in Amish country, gave up the patent on Zoloft and began a new life in the city as a cigar.com consultant, and every so often in the Philadelphia news papers you'll read stories of another attack on a sparsely bearded person...so the legend goes.
As a fellow beardo, I have to say, I am a huge fan of Tim "The Beard" and of the person growing around him and wearing him on it's face.
This thread is awesome, and only makes me want to continue using Cigar.com as my only source of cigars.
Tim's beard ordered me NOT to go to White Castle tonight...... I was powerless to it's commands. I am thoroughly enjoying my glass of water and apple right now!
Guns don't kill people, Daddies with pretty daughters do…..
They say that Osama bin Laden is dead and has been, I happen to know that he died the day his beard left and migrated to Tim. The beard knew his new host was a much better person but still a mastermind and ninja rolled into one.
I am currently in negotiations with this imposter for the page.....we are getting closer but the 11th hour is approaching....I may just have to enlist the services of the sniper....
I am currently in negotiations with this imposter for the page.....we are getting closer but the 11th hour is approaching....I may just have to enlist the services of the sniper....
No one, having seen an image of "The Beard" would ever be taken in by that rank amateur imposter. The beard has issued a "razor contract" on the imposter. Our instructions are " To hack it off on sight by any means necessary"
If you film The Beard and watch it on your tv, it'll appear in 3D. If you put on 3D glasses while watching, you'll see The Beard in 4D. Yes, I said 4D - The Beard is always one dimension ahead.
Comments
Actually, though The Beard is comprised of diamond-sharp straight ligero hairs, I have contracted with our resident Alien to construct a new beard of my own of an amazing, indestructible material known as dontfuckwithmeium.... ;-)
¨Only two people walk around in this world beardless - boys and women - and I am neither one.¨
Tim's beard...Febrezes itself!
I got through the 1st line of this and figured that this was serious!
Then realized! Oh yeah, this is the TB appreciation thread! Too funny! Too gullible!!
Need more coffee
This is what FML is for!
I have a pretty badass beard... but it pales in power. I consider it a minor player in THE BEARD's army of BOTLS.
http://www.facebook.com/pages/Tims-Beard/187818180108