Stupid **** that pops into my head

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  • peter4jc
    peter4jc Posts: 18,100 ✭✭✭✭✭

    This year is a third gone.

    "I could've had a Mi Querida!"   Nick Bardis
  • VegasFrank
    VegasFrank Posts: 20,406 ✭✭✭✭✭

    The golfer Victor Hovland is a letter away from getting run over by a bus full of people...

    @ScotchnSmoke sux lots of large wéiners. And tons of small ones. 
  • Amos_Umwhat
    Amos_Umwhat Posts: 9,805 ✭✭✭✭✭

    Is the 10 days to flatten the curve over yet?

    WARNING:  The above post may contain thoughts or ideas known to the State of Caliphornia to cause seething rage, confusion, distemper, nausea, perspiration, sphincter release, or cranial implosion to persons who implicitly trust only one news source, or find themselves at either the left or right political extreme.  Proceed at your own risk.  

    "If you do not read the newspapers you're uninformed.  If you do read the newspapers, you're misinformed." --  Mark Twain
  • ShawnOL
    ShawnOL Posts: 13,167 ✭✭✭✭✭

    So if the vaccine won't prevent you from catching the covid bug, and won't prevent you from spreading it, why are they pushing for proof of vaccination for travel? Is it because 98% survivable is better than 97%?

    Trapped in the People's Communist Republic of Massachusetts.

  • Patrickbrick
    Patrickbrick Posts: 8,085 ✭✭✭✭✭

    And why does everyone need it to stop the spread?

    "We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give".  Winston Churchill.
    MOW badge received.
  • peter4jc
    peter4jc Posts: 18,100 ✭✭✭✭✭

    Are we slowly making better house-flys and mosquitoes via natural selection by swatting and killing the slower ones?

    "I could've had a Mi Querida!"   Nick Bardis
  • jlmarta
    jlmarta Posts: 7,880 ✭✭✭✭✭

    ^^^^^Squirrel tracks^^^^^

  • Yakster
    Yakster Posts: 31,388 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited May 2021

    Real or fake? :D

    I've been watching DCI Banks on Hulu. He must be a crap detective because it always takes two episodes to close a case. It's entertaining, though.

    Join us on Zoom vHerf (Meeting # 2619860114 Password vHerf2020 )
  • CalvinAndHobo
    CalvinAndHobo Posts: 3,299 ✭✭✭✭✭

    You’ll never think of this word the same again when you say it to yourself in your head:

    Homeowner
    Ho-meow-ner

  • ShawnOL
    ShawnOL Posts: 13,167 ✭✭✭✭✭

    I think peanuts with the brown skin on them taste better than the ones without.

    Trapped in the People's Communist Republic of Massachusetts.

  • Bob_Luken
    Bob_Luken Posts: 11,661 ✭✭✭✭✭

    @ShawnOL said:

    I think peanuts with the brown skin on them taste better than the ones without.

    I read somewhere that the skin is very good for you too. Win win!

  • Vision
    Vision Posts: 9,980 ✭✭✭✭✭

    So my wife is at an upscale dress shop in a very, let’s say, not very diverse town. I walk in in my gym shorts and a t-shirt (with sleeves). I ask to use the rest room. “Oh no... I’m sorry. Closed because of COVID” 🤔 oooookay.... Young lady, well dressed in nice clothes asks “May I use a dressing room?” Owner: “This way please!”

    My thought.... does COVID spread more from me peeing or are we, at this point, just fuckking lazy!

  • Yakster
    Yakster Posts: 31,388 ✭✭✭✭✭

    Testosterone fueled road rage. I try and change lanes to let people with a bigger lead foot than me pass, but get really annoyed when a slowpoke speeds up when I try to pass.

    Mr. Walker is now Mr. Wheeler!

    https://youtu.be/HocJyvZxWWk

    Join us on Zoom vHerf (Meeting # 2619860114 Password vHerf2020 )
  • VegasFrank
    VegasFrank Posts: 20,406 ✭✭✭✭✭

    Yep

    @ScotchnSmoke sux lots of large wéiners. And tons of small ones. 
  • VegasFrank
    VegasFrank Posts: 20,406 ✭✭✭✭✭

    @Vision said:
    So my wife is at an upscale dress shop in a very, let’s say, not very diverse town. I walk in in my gym shorts and a t-shirt (with sleeves). I ask to use the rest room. “Oh no... I’m sorry. Closed because of COVID” 🤔 oooookay.... Young lady, well dressed in nice clothes asks “May I use a dressing room?” Owner: “This way please!”

    My thought.... does COVID spread more from me peeing or are we, at this point, just fuckking lazy!

    I walked into a Carl's Jr to use the restroom on Saturday. I was waiting for my little guy who was at his music lesson. I said I had to use the restroom. Guy said, "closed for covid.". I said, "ok," then went in the bathroom and took a leak. He came in and said I couldn't use it, but the ol Johnson rod was already dangling in front of the urinal. What could he do? I zipped up and he told me to get out. No problem, buddy. Later!

    @ScotchnSmoke sux lots of large wéiners. And tons of small ones. 
  • Amos_Umwhat
    Amos_Umwhat Posts: 9,805 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited May 2021

    @0patience said:
    Why do people who do 45 in a 55 mph zone speed up to 65 or 70 in the passing lanes?
    And why can't we hit them when they do?

    I've often fantasized about taking a paintball gun and splattering the windshield of cars whose drivers are blandly texting as they careen blindly down the road. But, then they'd probably run into something or someone and next thing you know people would say it was MY fault. Oh well.

    WARNING:  The above post may contain thoughts or ideas known to the State of Caliphornia to cause seething rage, confusion, distemper, nausea, perspiration, sphincter release, or cranial implosion to persons who implicitly trust only one news source, or find themselves at either the left or right political extreme.  Proceed at your own risk.  

    "If you do not read the newspapers you're uninformed.  If you do read the newspapers, you're misinformed." --  Mark Twain
  • Rhamlin
    Rhamlin Posts: 9,137 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited May 2021

    Why is it that 30 minutes after taking a dump does some piece of corn or something always makes it way out to drive me nuts?
    Hey don’t blame me I wasn’t the one who named this thread. 😳

  • VegasFrank
    VegasFrank Posts: 20,406 ✭✭✭✭✭

    Yeah that's a Ricky problem ^

    @ScotchnSmoke sux lots of large wéiners. And tons of small ones. 
  • VegasFrank
    VegasFrank Posts: 20,406 ✭✭✭✭✭

    Liz Cheney for president!

    @ScotchnSmoke sux lots of large wéiners. And tons of small ones. 
  • Amos_Umwhat
    Amos_Umwhat Posts: 9,805 ✭✭✭✭✭

    @VegasFrank said:
    Liz Cheney for president!

    Hmm....you know, we could pair her up with AOC as a running mate and create the Gray Goose Party, along the lines of TR's Bull Moose Party. "Tired of the same old Big Ticket crap? Vote for the Ragin' Vag-n's. At least you know they mean it!" Might work. Lord, help us.

    WARNING:  The above post may contain thoughts or ideas known to the State of Caliphornia to cause seething rage, confusion, distemper, nausea, perspiration, sphincter release, or cranial implosion to persons who implicitly trust only one news source, or find themselves at either the left or right political extreme.  Proceed at your own risk.  

    "If you do not read the newspapers you're uninformed.  If you do read the newspapers, you're misinformed." --  Mark Twain
  • Yakster
    Yakster Posts: 31,388 ✭✭✭✭✭

    @VegasFrank said:
    Yeah that's a Ricky problem ^

    Um, yeah, that's a Ricky problem.

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  • 0patience
    0patience Posts: 10,665 ✭✭✭✭✭

    @Amos_Umwhat said:

    @VegasFrank said:
    Liz Cheney for president!

    Hmm....you know, we could pair her up with AOC as a running mate and create the Gray Goose Party, along the lines of TR's Bull Moose Party. "Tired of the same old Big Ticket crap? Vote for the Ragin' Vag-n's. At least you know they mean it!" Might work. Lord, help us.

    The makings of a really scary horror movie.

    In Fumo Pax
    Money can't buy happiness, but it can buy cigars and that's close enough.

    Wylaff said:
    Atmospheric pressure and crap.
  • VegasFrank
    VegasFrank Posts: 20,406 ✭✭✭✭✭

    Tell you what, if Cruz or trumpkin gets the nomination, then a lifelong democrat will be born in my house on the same day...

    @ScotchnSmoke sux lots of large wéiners. And tons of small ones. 
  • Rhamlin
    Rhamlin Posts: 9,137 ✭✭✭✭✭

    @Yakster said:

    @VegasFrank said:
    Yeah that's a Ricky problem ^

    Um, yeah, that's a Ricky problem.

    Yeah I doubt that!

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